10749/Girl from Ipanema

Girl from Ipanema
Date of Scene:	15 January 2020
Location:	Lift, Xavier's School
Synopsis:	Jubilee finds Deadpool on a ceiling, and helps out.
Cast of Characters:	Deadpool, Jubilee

---

Deadpool has posed:
"Second floor: Housewares, Women's Lingerie; WATCH your STEP," Deadpool announces as the elevator doors open. He is on the ceiling, for some reason. It's usually not important to know Deadpool's reasons, but this one is somewhat apparent: he's gotten part of his suit wedged in a slat in the ceiling of the elevator, on the left hip. So he is doing a Mission Impossible, partially hanging from that, and partially using both legs and one arm to not twist around sideways from the pivot he is stuck by.

"Welcome to the elevator of loneliness; in this space we are all alone, all together." The music assures that everything is jazzy and fine. The girl from Ipanema goes walking.

Jubilee has posed:
Outside the doors, Jubilee looks up from her phone with its happy game music playing, and her music stops. The Girl from Ipanema keeps playing. "What the f--oh. Hi, Wade!" Jubilee chirps. "Nice try, but your giant diamond is in another castle. I applaud your form, though. Very suave and dubya tee eff."

Deadpool has posed:
"I don't want to cut my suit, I just fixed it," Wade laments. "And if I cut it, I'll have to put duct tape around my crotch AGAIN here and that isn't a good look for me around all these children. I'm concerned with /optics/," Wade chatters.

"Which isn't to say I have a solution. Unless you have some nice boxers. I prefer hearts or other novelty designs, not plaid. Plaid is very 'I'm not fucking lonely' and clearly..." Wade gestures up and down himself, "There is some importance to that warning label."

Jubilee has posed:
Jubilee has entered the elevator and is circling him slowly, nodding in the appropriate places. And in the inappropriate places. "Ssssssooo, what you're saying is, this wasn't intentional." With Wade, she never assumes anything was an accident. "H-How did you...I mean, what were you..." She gestures vaguely to everything ceilingward.

Deadpool has posed:
"I liked the music," Wade says, which probably is sarcasm. Maybe? And answers zero things about the ceiling part.

"What game are you playing?" Wade asks belatedly. "I am playing the game of dating. I've been playing the single-player mode, is the problem. I have not yet seemed to have unlocked the multiplayer option of that. I think it's a DLC but I forgot my password, and the mechanics are different in multiplayer," Wade prattles along.

Jubilee has posed:
"Well, THAT explains /everything/," Jubilee replies. "I'm playing that old Goose game from like years ago. It's honkerrific." She studies Wade from a few different angles, then crinkles her nose. "Well, I think I can getcha down, but I'll need to get a chair to stand on. Or like a stepladder maybe." The doors have now closed, and the elevator is sitting still. "Looks like your buttflange is stuck between the grid and the ceiling tile. I could hold ya up, and we could lift the tile, and it would release you. Better than freeballin' across campus. Y'think?"

Deadpool has posed:
"Sure. Find the thing. I'll hang out here," Wade agrees, with both hands moved to do thumbs up, which makes his weight shift against the ceiling tile a little bit. "But take pity, leave me with the goose game," Wade asks, flipping his hands outwards to do a grabby-grab at her honkerrific game offering.

Jubilee has posed:
Jubilee grins and tosses Wade her phone as she pushes the button to open the doors. "Have fun! I'll be in Women's Lingerie if you need me. Just like...yell, or somethin'."

The doors close behind her as she goes  off to look for the thing, and she's gone for at least ten minutes before Wade can hear various thumps, thuds, and giggles outside the door, growing nearer. When the doors open again, an oversized tufted leather armchair appears, and Jubilee is behind it, shoving it inside with a number of squeaks and scooty sounds. "Found one!"

Deadpool has posed:
Wade grabs at the phone, knocks it a little off his fingers, and then grabs with the other hand. Juggle, juggle, got it. He salutes evenly. "Bring me back a sovenier!" he calls from his spot, and then begins to .. well.. play the Goose Game, while he waits. "This is way more fun than it should be, to be a goose," observes Deadpool.

"Come on, daddy needs to wear the pretty ribbon..."

When the armchair arrives, Wade applauds. "I got the ribbon!" he proudly informs. "Why is it camouflage patterned?" Wade asks of the chair. "To hide from your wife while you're watchin' the game?"

Jubilee has posed:
"I don't have a wife," Jubilee replies with a grunt as she gives the chair a final shove to center it beneath Wade. She looks straight up, and seeing just so much crotch, she scootches the chair just a little to the left. "I think Chuck made it camouflage to keep me from finding it and stealing it. Good job on the ribbon, though!" She gives Wade a thumbs-up.

Now cloistered into a closed elevator with Wade and a giant armchair, Jubilee ties her sneaker, adjusts her black and pink tracksuit, and climbs up on the chair. "Ooookay. We need a plan."

Deadpool has posed:
"I didn't think it was YOUR chair. Because you said you found it. That would be a weird thing to say about your own chair. Although it's camouflage so that's actually--- I take it back. That's entirely logical, for a hidden chair. You did find it.

"I'm going to honk at this woman," Wade says, as she prompts for a plan. "Oh. Focus. Yeah. Here. Take the distraction away," he insists, pushing the phone down towards her. "so yeah, maybe just like, reach around, and push that ceiling tile and I'll try to bend in half and wiggle my ass."

"This isn't the first time I've made a plan that sounded like this."

Jubilee has posed:
"Mmhmm..." Jubilee replies distractedly. "I'm gonna honk at this woman. Osht...Run, goose! Run!" Jubilee tilts the phone, as if gravity would somehow help the goose run faster. "Man, she was /pissed/. Oh yeah...distraction." She looks around for a moment, but doesn't find a suitable place for her phone, so she pockets it.

"It'll be easier if we can lift you up a little," she says, surveying the lay of the...Deadpool. "I'm gonna need your hip on my shoulder. You can wiggle it when I'm holding you up."

Deadpool has posed:
"Kinky," Wade says playfully, but is otherwise cooperative, patting his hip as if to invite her to bring herself on over. Or up. Or whatever the weird situation is that they are doing. "We need somebody to walk into the elevator in the middle of this," Wade comments in amusement.

"Enact plan! Worst case, we need another plan!"

Jubilee has posed:
"Aye, Cap'n!" Jubilee climbs up and stands on the arms of the chair, fitting her shoulder against Wade's hip, and lifting him upward to create slack. "Okay...now...wiggle!"

Deadpool has posed:
"Fortunately (Unfortunately?), I am a master of dancing to music within my own head. Although yeah, this elevator mus-zac is inspiring in a 'let's take a nap' sort of way. Not so much the required pop and unlock-ass-from-ceiling movement, but I'll do my best. Maximum effort twerk, watch yourself," Wade says. With that warning in place, Wade kicks his foot backwards to brace, and twists during her lift.

He suddenly and unexpectedly comes loose. "I'M COMING," Wade yells, top volume. Down, he means. Dirty birds, you guys.

Jubilee has posed:
At the same time, Jubilee lifts him and pushes up on the ceiling tile, trying to release him from the confines of his spandex and ceiling tile prison. "My God, I think you're ten pounds heavier when you wiggle!" But when he goes down, he goes down hard, and Jubilee squeaks and topples.

Deadpool has posed:
"I bruised my wookiee ," Wade complains, nonsensically. "I heal, I'm good. That was just some Simpsons reference that somehow was relevant to this situation. I'm good, I'm good," Wade chatterboxes. He landed ass-up on the leather recliner in a tangle of weird limbs with his savior.

"Yaaaaaaay, free," Wade says, extending his arms, and dragging himself forwards off the chair/savior and onto the elevator floor.

Jubilee has posed:
"It's amazing what you can do when you put my shoulder to it." Jubilee grins and hops down off the chair. "What next? We gonna go get some hot chocolate to celebrate? I never pulled a dude off the ceiling once. A velcro wall, maybe. THAT was fun, too."

Deadpool has posed:
"Okay! Let me turn on my disguise," Wade says, as he does a somersault on the floor to stand up close to the elevator door. He pauses, though. "Any requests?" he asks, upbeat. "It is required to be child friendly, as all this-" himself, "isn't, apparently. I take it very personally." Not really.

"Because I am a person." Kind of.

"I want tiny marshmellows in mine." The chocolate.

Jubilee has posed:
"No problem. I know where they hide the marshmallows, and I can shove more marshmallows in than you thought possible." Jubilee replies, then looks at Wade for a long moment. "Uhhh...How about that guy on The Princess Bride?"

Deadpool has posed:
"Sure!" Deadpool says, tapping on the device. Very promptly, appears a very detailed and accurate rendition of Mandy Patinkin. "My name is Inigo Montoya," Deadpool informs her, striking the 'open' on the doors of the elevator (regardless of whatever floor), and steps out, pulling his sword from his back and striding forward. The sword goes with the appearance, of course.

"I swear on the soul of my father, Domingo Montoya, you shall reach the kitchen alive."