11953/The Conqueror Cometh: He Arrives

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The Conqueror Cometh: He Arrives
Date of Scene: 09 August 2020
Location: Upper East Side, Manhattan
Synopsis: Conan and the evil Sorcerer Supreme travel from the Hyborean Age. When a giant monster is brought forth heroes from this time team up with Conan to destroy it and save Manhattan!
Cast of Characters: Conan the Cimmerian, Phantasm (Drago), Iron Man, Thor, Hulk
Tinyplot: The Conqueror Cometh


Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
It is the Hyborian age. 10,000 years before the current era. Conan the Cimmerian travels the Earth, living off the land and what he can earn and steal. Tonight is a night for murder and thievery.

The barbarian has tracked his enemy, the wizard Riath Thalm, to a site of great magical power. Thalm has surrounded himself with guards, knowing the Cimmerian is coming for him. But why is Conan hunting the wizard? Because not only is Thalm working evil incantations to travel to a special location to summon an evil god, his magical staff is gold plated and Conan wants to take it from the sorcerer's corpse.

The fearsome warrior sneaks towards the mage's ritual, his keen senses alerting him to the presence and location of the guards. There are six. Armed with sharp blades and heavy armor. And they expect to be attacked. This will not be the easiest assassination and robbery the Cimmerian has ever attempted.

The first guard doesn't see the wily Conan approach and has his head split by the barbarian's two handed sword. The others start to react, but the next one is too slow and finds a blade through his heart, punching through his mail almost as if it wasn't there. The other four have a fight on their hands. Blades clang, the sound of metal on metal ringing loudly. Soon, however, all of the guards have perished.

"That is enough!" cries the wizard. He slices open his palm and draws a circle on the ground in his own blood. Conan steps up to slay the magic practitioner, raising his blade above his head as he finds himself inside of the circle...

WHOOSH! Air flows swiftly around the pair as the mighty Cimmerian's blow splits Thalm's head in half. Suddenly, they are in the midst of a strange, new place. Metallic carriages without horses scream to a stop before striking the pair. Tall stone buildings surround them. Strangely clad people, many wearing colors as bright as tropical birds, stop and stare. There are many strange sights, sounds and smells overwhelming the barbarian's senses.

Thalm steps away from Conan, head almost instantly healing itself, and mutters the last few words of his incantation, bringing his jeweled dagger up and plunging it into his own heart! As Thalm falls to the ground, something strange begins to happen. There's a tearing sound as the wizard's chest is pulled apart from the inside. Thalm nearly explodes as he's torn by the creature coming out of it. The strange, alien beast is already larger than any man as it emerges from Thalm's chest cavity. With long, ape-like arms that end in sharp onyx claws, a hundred or more teeth like daggers in it's maw, six shining black eyes, four claw footed legs, a scorpion's tail and a scale covered body it is a thing from nightmares.

Seeing the beast Conan charges it, letting out a mighty growl! "GRRR!" His sword strikes the beast's scaled side and slides off of its armor. Rather than engage the barbarian it goes for easier prey, leaping away from its attacker to pounce on a pedestrian, eating a poor dog walker's head in one mighty chomp!

"Oh my god! Call the Avengers!" yells a passerby. Another screams out, "Superman! Save us!" People are freaking out and fleeing in all directions.

Meanwhile, Thalm stands up, brushes himself off, makes another teleportation circle and disappears.

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
As people are fleeing from the scene a solitary figure stands just outside of Rockwallz gym. He had just finished a session in back when the screaming drew his attention outside. The dressed down musician, still in gym attire, tilts his head in reaction. "You have got to be kidding me..." Nick mutters, turning to head back to the locker room. Eh, some guy with a sword's already fighting it. There's time.

Iron Man has posed:
And call the Avengers they did...

Unfortunately, Tony Stark is notoriously bad about ignoring phone calls, and did not answer any of the many that poured in through the Avengers' network.

Fortunately, he's got a guy for that. And 'a guy' is currently giving Tony a gentle upbraiding from inside of Tony's latest version of the Iron Man helmet.

He's wearing the rest of the armor too, for the record.

"Forgive me, but I fail to see the benefit of coding alerts received through the Avengers' Network if you're simply going to ignore all of them equally..." The Britishness of J.A.R.V.I.S. has been buried so deep in the source code that it's probably in the first line that Tony wrote.

Flying through the air away from Avengers HQ, Iron Man doesn't seem to be hitting the afterburners or anything. But then... the Avengers also get a lot of hoax calls.

And this sounds like one.

"I didn't IGNORE the call, J.A.R.V.I.S., I didn't HEAR it. You know what I always say when I'm trying to weld and listen to old school metal, don't you?"

Inside the helmet, J.A.R.V.I.S. signs audibly. "'Not now, Chief, I'm in the zone.' Yes, I'm familiar with your clever expression..."

It goes on like this for a while.

"Muting you now, Jarv... Thor! How we lookin'?"

Onward the Armored Avenger streaks, rapidly nearing the coordinates from the call. But it's only when he gets within a kilometer that he can make out the traffic jams and signs of chaos that are already beginning to show.

Looks like it wasn't a hoax, after all.

Thor has posed:
"Not well. Battle has been joined below. And the creature just ate someone's head, so we must slay it quickly. Banner, are you ready?" Assuming he is, Thor, flying with Mjolnir and carrying Banner in the other, will basically toss Banner at the threat when Banner gives the signal he's ready...

Once Thor unloads his passenger, he has his manueverability back so he lands on a rooftop, and basically yells at the monster...in the Allspeech, which all things that have a language understand..."...Leave off the Midgardians, and face Thor, god of Thunder!" He issues a challenge to the thing! He does catch a guy down there with a sword and...very little clothes, but he seems to be a warrior who can take care of himself, and the normal Midgardians are in great danger at the moment.

In the event the monster ignores him, which he is mostly expecting, he'll throw Mjolnir to tag it when it goes to eat another halpless soul, whoever it happens to be.

Hulk has posed:
He had been in the city when the creature had appeared, but wasn't nearby. With his smartphone already pinging an alert to a livestream for the creature, Bruce knew it was only a matter of minutes before an Avenjet or Thor picked him up from the streets... and he promptly stripped off his outer layer of clothing into his backpack, setting it into an alcove in an alleyway nearby. The only thing left was his Hulk green uniform as as he awaited Thor's arrival.

By the time he and Thor were in the air nearby the creature, Bruce was decidedly nervous, "I'm never ready for-" And he gets tossed at the creature in the air, headfirst, "-tttttthhhhhhiiiiiisssssssss!" The last word slowly changing tone from Bruce, to a deep growl, as he starts to transform midair, green eyes stare down even as his pink skin begins to turn green as he flies through the air like a rocket.

A green rocket, with no control at all. It's gonna hurt.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
The monster continues its rampage. Each chomp of flesh it takes increases its size and mass. Where once it was merely biting off heads, soon it's swallowing entire torsos. In just a matter of moments it will be consuming whole humans. Conan is bound and determined to do something about it, "By Crom, what makes this beast die!" Because his sword certainly isn't cutting it. Another *CLANG* as steel hits scale and the barbarian's blade rebounds from the strike.

Soon, however, the ancient warrior has his hands full as the beast gives birth to a smaller creature, looking exactly like the first only about the size of a motorcycle. It tries to bite Conan's head off only to find the man's steel sword driven into it's gut. Apparently, the offspring are not as strong as the original.

A brave police officer attempts to stand up to the giant monster, putting himself between the monster and a group of huddled citizens. As he fires his handgun ineffectually he yells for the non-combatants to get to the subway. Soon, officer cop shall be nothing but monster chow if something is not done!

Luckily, an Asgardian hammer distracts the monster before it can eat the peace officer. The beast doesn't appear to understand language at all, but it does understand a hammer to the dome! Roaring, it turns towards Thor and whips it's tail at him, the tip of it dripping with venom.

Then Hulk slams into the whip tailed monstrosity! Rearing back on it's back legs after the strike it lashes out with the claws on its forelegs and at the end of its arms at the greenest Avenger, trying to tear him to shreds while bellowing out an earthshaking roar!

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
The inside of the gym is a tad chaotic. A number of people are running to the back of the gym to use the fire exit to lead to a street further from the creature while a number of people are still clustered up front at the window. Nick had to shuffle through a few people but the locker room was eventually reached. There's no back exit out of the locker room but the room is incredibly empty of people. But, that's not to say others won't come in.

Taking a left, he walks over to a bank of stalls and walks in to one. In the silence of the locker room, there's a creak of a door and the thwack of a latch.

Silence.

Walking underneath the stall door without having to stoop too far, a 26 inch tall, publish black corvid struts out.

Blink.

Blink.

The three foot wingspan spreads out as the bird hops into the air, flying through a wall with not even a scratch marking the exit point.

The scene the bird returns to is a different one that it left. But it is a bit more promising with the avengers on hand. And perhaps he's not needed at all in this endeavour. But...

Black, beady eyes look to the scorpion tail, and then towards a stop sign.

Iron Man has posed:
"Look alive, Avengers! We've got ourselves an honest to god monster! Must be Tuesday..."

J.A.R.V.I.S. pipes up "Actually sir, it's Mon..."

"MUTING!"

As the Bowling Ball Twins roll their way straight into battle, Iron Man hangs back a bit, does a few scans, and runs a couple of combat scenarios through the old Onboard Battle Computer. But everything that's scrolling past his eyes tells him that it'll take more than an Iron Punch to take this thing out.

Firing a repulsor blast at the creature's head from his (relatively) safe spot in the air, Tony begins attempting to call in back up, and coordinating with first responders to clear the area of civilians.

"Huh. Looks like we weren't the first heroes on the scene. Is that the guy from the cover of those Meat Loaf albums?"

Thor has posed:
Thor grins at the incoming tail. "...Bad move." After all, it's only the tip of the tail dripping venom. The rest of it, however, is something Thor can catch. And that's exactly what he does. The ground crumbles beneath his feet as the force of the blow drives him backwards a solid 30 feet or so. But he holds on.

"Gotcha."

Once he catches the tail, he puts Mjolnir on top of the tail. The creature isn't worthy, so its tail is now thoroughly pinned, and the rest of the creature is now like a dog on a chain, since it can't move beyond the radius of its tail.

"Let us grapple the creature while its tail is pinned. Midgardians will have time to escape if it cannot chase them."

Temporarily hammerless to keep it pinned, that doesn't stop Thor from touching the handle, and using it to channel the storm. Either the creature will ignore him, and he'll be able to call the storm unhindered...or it'll attack him with the rest of its body, and the midgardians will easily get away since it's focused on him. Either way, Thor's happy with this.

As for who the warrior with the sword is, "I know not, but he wields that sword with considerable skill." Thor actually respects the way that sword's being used. It's pretty effective, even by the standards of a 1500 year old from a race of warrior gods.

Hulk has posed:
Unfortunately for the Hulk, he won't have time to capitalize on Thor's grappling, because he's busy being pummeled into the street by a creature nearly as strong as his initial transformation is.

Sure, he's diverting the things attention, but that also means that there's a slowly spreading crater being pummeled into the ground, and his uniform gets a rip here and there as the Hulk grunts with the effort of taking the hits.

He was basically tossed like a cannonball into the creature, and didn't even have a chance to get his bearings before the massive assault, so he's gonna be there for a bit.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
The giant monster continues giving birth to smaller beasts faster than the Cimmerian can slay them, though Conan is giving his all! "Beast! Stop giving birth so that I can climb to your skull and drive my blade into it!" Individually, the littler monsters don't stand a chance, but soon there may be enough to overwhelm even the Hyborian Age's greatest warrior.

The beast's tail ends up pinned by the magical hammer's weight. No way is it worthy. It's got a bunch of limbs to attack with, however. One arm scoops up some humans and shoves them into the mouth, unfortunately spitting a few out as a repulsor blast hits its head. The fall might actually not kill a couple of them, though they'll be horribly injured by it.

As the front legs come down on the green marauder it's free arm claws lash out towards the god of Thunder, trying to rend him asunder.

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
Gliding over to the stop sign talons latch on to the back of the stop sign, as the raven looks to the bolts to the back of the sign. Seemingly ignoring the battle behind him as he brings wings towards the objects fastening the sign in place. One by one the bolts fall to the ground, causing for the sign to loosen.

When the sign clangs to the ground the raven hops down, using its Talons to grasp on to the sign and fly up with it. The weight of the sign becoming in consequential as the power of the bird flows into the sign itself, rendering it intangible. Prize in hand, the bird flies over towards the tail that Thor grapples with.

Looking for a portion that is smaller in circumference than the sign before inserting it in and letting go, taking the power away from the object to allow for it to become solid again.

Iron Man has posed:
"We gotta help Hulk! J.A.R.V.I.S, keep running Battle Simulations 8, 13, and... 29. I'll probe for weak spots with the repulsors, let me know if you find any."

"Affirmative."

A few more repulsor blasts are fired at the larger creature, with data gathered from each one. Each at a different frequency, hoping to either get lucky or collate enough data to come up with a solution.

However, it's becoming clear that they're going to have much bigger problems if the creature continues reproducing at that rate.

"Thor! Try to take the heat off of Hulk! I'll see what I can do about containing these little ones."

Switching his repulsors from the big guy to the smaller ones, Tony begins firing rapidly from up in the air. Moving in a strafing pattern to keep from providing too tempting a target.

Thor has posed:
The good news is, the severed stinger means the tail can no longer poison things. The bad news is, that also frees the tail, because the hammmer was pinning it pretty close to the tail. The corresponding other good news, Thor can now call his Hammer back, and he's going to need it to meaningfully aid Hulk.

Thor's storm calling also darkened the sky quite a bit, which means lightning is available. If physical force were adequate, Hulk would already be pummeling this thing, particularly as he gets even angrier. Let's try energy then.

"Have at you!" And lightning comes down from the sky, hits the hammer, and gets blasted at the creature, specifically the part of the creature closes to Hulk. If it recoils at all, Hulk should be able to get away just long enough to change his angle of attack. This is what teamwork is for!

Hulk has posed:
It takes a bit, but the help of Thor to distract the creature away from attacking him seems to do the trick. Hulk takes the opportunity to leap out of the hole he made and in a random direction, sending him face first into a building and through the wall, inside.

He's definitely disoriented for a moment, but it doesn't take long for him to shake that off as he turns around and looks at the creature through the *OTHER* hole he made, "Hulk never seen this before. Hulk will just SMASH!" Hulk roars as he charges forward, growing visibly to eleven feet, before he brings himself around to shoulder check the creature right in the face.

This time when he tries to put it on his back, the Hulk will be pummeling IT instead.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
The sign slams into the beast's tail and slices off the stinger, for sure.

One of the repulsor blasts does hit a weak spot! One of the six black eyes bursts, spilling vitreous fluid down it's face and to the ground and causing the creature to rear back in pain once more. Unfortunately, it now looks angry. The other blasts do an admirable job of dispatching and distracting the little monsters on the ground.

Thor's mighty lightning blast doesn't seem to do quite the damage that it should, however it does cause a momentary lull in the monster's attack and causes it to look for where the strike came from: Thor.

Conan now has some relief from the smaller critters he's tangling with, "Thank you, sky man! When you die I shall put your armor to great use!" Dancing between the babies the warrior on the ground almost makes killing them look easy. As one scorpion tail is launched at him he grabs it and jams it through it's owners eyes, causing them to pop and the creature to drop. Another feels the sting of his sword as it's stabbed in the face.

The mean, green, SMASHing machine's shoulder check knocks the beast over so that it can be properly brutalized. It doesn't stay down, for very long, getting all four of its legs under it to leverage itself back up. Then the giant, toothy maw comes for the Hulk!

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
Objective completed, the raven scoops up the sign once more into his talons, loaning his abilities back into the sign as he goes airborne once aga-

The sign gets dropped as the bird startles away from the lightning strike coming down. "Fff-!"

The raven's path arches, loop de looping over to grab at the stop sign again. The Octagon of justice- Oh gee that's horrible- The stop sign visually screams it message as it flies across the sky.

STOOOOOOOOOOOOOP

Or at least that's the visual for mama monster as the bird spins mid air, jabbing the sign into the head parallel to the eyes before flying off without the sign.

Iron Man has posed:
"Simulation 8 complete. Uploading summary to your visual cortex."

As Tony's retina gets painted by information at the speed of lasers, on the outside Iron Man is still mixing it up with the Big Bad, though he's mostly still trying to contain the threats and keep between them and any civilians who haven't managed to flee from the area.

It's a rapidly-shrinking number, but Tony is still coordinating the efforts of first responders through the networked AI systems in his armor.

"Don't mention it, Boromir! Love the bangs!" Iron Man salutes the hulking barbarian before he goes back to circling the Main Threat.

"Oh god... J.A.R.V.I.S., tell me these numbers aren't right."

"If they weren't correct, it would be impossible for me to know, Tony. This represents our current best chance for containing the monster and minimizing life loss and infrastructure damage."

Iniside his helmet, Tony Stark audibly sighs.

Outwardly though, he projects his voice through the Iron Boom Box loudly enough for everyone to hear.

"Guys! I'm going to need you to keep Big and Crusty as busy as you can. For it to be reproducing at this rate, it means it almost certainly has to be somehow... uh... having sex with itself."

Hitting the thrusters, Tony zooms in closer to the monster, but just out of reach.

"That means I'm going to have to give it a Repulsor Vasectomy!"

Thor has posed:
So far, the only real 'weak spot' he's seen was when an attack blinded one of the creature's 6 eyes. While Thor wasn't a sharp objects sort of guy, he didn't need to be. Mjolnir could blind things too.

Thor then leaps up to the creature's face, since it was looking in his direction anyway, and tries to bring the hammer down onto at least one of those eyes. And in case the blunt force trauma wasn't enough, a second electrical discharge strikes the hammer in mid swing, and now there's also lightning being flung at an eye. He's quite sure he'll get its attention while Tony castrates the thing.

"It has no business breeding in these lands. Therefore, make sure it does not."

Hulk has posed:
It comes up against the Hulk... and the Hulk goes up against it right back. Hulk utterly ignores the things size, both of his massive hands reach out for that gaping maw, actually grabbing onto the teeth and gritting his own teeth against the inevitable pain that brings.

"HULK HATES THIS BLACK THING ALREADY!" He roars into the night air. At his current level of rage, the Hulk was only dead even with it... but that will change.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
As the sign slices into one of the monster's eyes it sinks into the thing's head. It's not dead, not by any stretch, but that's another one of its eyes that have been burst. And more anger on the part of the giant. That may be making stronger, too.

Conan's still slashing away, having a grand time of things apparently. "Sever its vas deferens, Sky Man!" Then he looks towards Thor, seeing it burst another eye with the combination of hammer strike and lightning. It's quite effective. "Green Puncher, if you can knock it over again Wing Helmet and I shall jump into through its eyes and climb into its brain!"

Hulk's fingers will fine purchase amidst the hundred sword-like teeth and grapple the creature to a stand still, the strength of the beings causing the earth under them to rumble.

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
At the mention of Tony's plan, the bird arcs a brow in reaction. Which, considering the usual facial features of a bird, seems a tad unnatural. But hey, it's already been showing STOP signs where they should be so a brow arc is nothing.

The bird continues its arc up, looping once more to take a glance to the scene below before div-

Lightning.

"RAWK!"

The wings flap back as he ends up averting his path to avoid becoming extra crispy. Okay! Time to regroup.

Iron Man has posed:
"Tony, believe I've located the ideal point to strike. One hit from the repulsors should destroy the creature's ability to reproduce."

J.A.R.V.I.S. produces an array of figures and calculations, along with a quickly-rendered three-dimensional view of the creature's internal structure. It's a lot to take in, but Tony takes it like a champ.

"I'm sensing a 'but' coming, J.A.R.V.I.S..."

As his teammates (and the other guys) keep the creature busy, Tony finally goes in for the kill. Close enough, anyway, he'll figure it out when he gets there.

"Not technically a 'butt', Tony. The creature appears to have its sexual organs contained within a cloaca-like structure that enables it to..."

"Dammit J.A.R.V.I.S.! How deep do I have to go?" Iron Man circles around behind the creature, trying to stay clear of its thrashing arms in the process as he lines up his strike.

"Roughly elbow deep, sir..."

Diverting power to the armor's psuedopnuematic musculature, Iron Man rears back and punches the creature as hard as he can.

His arm disappears up to the elbow.

"GAH! Please don't let this end up online!"

There's a muffled 'PZOOF!' as the repulsor blast goes off inside the creature, cleanly separating the... organ parts.

Thor has posed:
Thor continues his assault on the creatures eyes. He will blacken them all, one by one. If this does not kill the creature, there is significant value in blinding it, for it should then be more easily slain. Thor continues getting up upon its nose, and brings his hammer, again with another lightning bolt, down on the next eye. Soon, he should be able to finish this task. He does not know if the great warrior is right about being able to cut his way through an eye to the brain, but it does make some sense. Still, hammers are not cutting tools, so Thor isn't exactly ideally equipped for such a job.

"If it is possible to cut through to the creature's brain, lead the way, noble warrior." Cause he's got a sword. That should logically work better.

Hulk has posed:
The Hulk is the strongest there is... but the Hulk is only one being. One being that's deadlocked against another massive creature that seems to be able to grow in strength with anger just as he does.

It doesn't matter, because the others start making life for the thing decidedly unpleasant... and that gives the Hulk just enough leverage to start trying to push the creature back. His feet are already creating more craters in the street as he does so, so great is the force being exerted by both of them.

This street is going to be out of order for a while, after this.... but at least the Hulk isn't tearing apart the entire block being thrown around bodily.

With a feral roar, the Hulk grows to twelve feet and begins trying to head wrestle the thing around, twisting it onto it's back. Trying to just push it directly would just have him walk over the thing, after all.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
The giant gets a sudden look of surprise, as much as it's face can show, and leaps into the air, going straight up for a moment before coming down on top of Iron Man. Then it attempts to move, dragging the poor metal clad billionaire around underneath it's body, its four legs moving from side to side in an attempt to scrape him off. It fails, Tony appears stuck.

Hulk is able to take advantage of the beast's distraction to wrestle it successfully. It's tail lashes out, smashing a number of vehicles, but it appears to be held tight for the moment.

Conan takes advantage of the monster's stunned state to leap towards its eyes, leading with his sword he's able to slash through one of them, "To me, Wing Helmet!" Then, the Cimmerian warrior dives through the softness of the eye to enter its head, lashing out with his blade around him.

In other good news, while he's still stuck arm deep in a monstrosity, Tony's now being dragged around a lot less.

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
Over to the side,the raven gives the thunderer a wide berth as magic lightning doesn't agree with him. But, with Thor taking out the eyes, Hulk wrapping up the creature, Sword guy... doing something and Iron Man playing doctor there's really not much to d-

"RAWK!"

As the creature jumps, the bird ends up looping once more in reaction, path leveling off to get a glimpse of an Iron Man underneath, who does not appear to be dislodging himself from the creature rather easily.

Decision made, The bird flies towards Iron Man, wrapping his wings around the genius, pumping some of his power into him. "Close your eyes and run to the right!" The bird snaps.

Iron Man has posed:
"GAAAAAAAAAH! You didn't say this would happen, J.A.R.V.I.S.!"

Getting scraped along the asphalt, Iron Man plays his part in a reenactment of a dog pulling itself along the carpet, albeit at something like fifty times the scale.

And he just finished this armor last week...

Getting whacked a few times isn't going to kill him, probably, but it'll definitely scuff the finish on the Mark 42.

But as he frantically tries to dislodge his arm, Iron Man suddenly finds himself feeling terribly strange and hearing something in what he imagines Bird Language would sound like if he could understand it.

So, English, then.

"Run to the right? What the?"

But he complies with the instructions, clambering to his feet as best he can and trying to move in that direction.

Strangely enough, it works, and he's free.

Thor has posed:
Once Conan has the hole cut, it's time for Thor to enter the hole made. For now, the lightning stops, as he's working next to someone who wields metal, and he doesn't need any accidents happening inside of a creature. "Let us hence, then,"

When Thor follows the creature in...he's at least able to see, for Asgardian perception is that little bit better...and he's smashed enough heads on the field of battle to know what a brain more or less looks like. "...Aim for the wrinkly thing."

From there, Thor takes his own advice, and lays about with his hammer, trying to not simply beat on the brain, but bash his way through it. The creature absolutely need to die.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
"I have seen much brain matter, Wing Helmet!" Conan says as he begins chopping the giant's brain. Between him and Thor it will soon start convulsing on the ground. The only reason the head isn't flailing about is Hulk's mighty grip on the thing. Eventually, with the magical power of Mjolnir doing it's thing, the beast will stop moving. After that it's only a matter of climbing back out of the head. Conan, at least, is soaked in vitreous fluid and cerebrospinal fluid. When he emerges he yells out to the sky, "We have slain the beast! Sky Man with his vasectomy! Green Puncher with his great strength! Horn Helmet and myself with our brain destruction! Bird with its red shields! Together we have overcome. Let us bathe and drink and celebrate our defeat of this monster, for more will surely come if the wizard is not stopped!"

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
Once Tony is free of the monster and he's certain he's not going to get smacked silly, the raven gives a sigh, "Okay eyes open. That was gross. Good to go?"

He glances back to the creature but upon seeing it no longer moving, just lets go of Iron Man, taking his power away from Tony. "Ah. Looks like you get a breather."

Iron Man has posed:
Awkwardly holding his right arm verrrry far away from his body, Iron Man looks at the still-quivering mound of flesh that used to be a pretty threatening monster. None of the monster's guts and filth actually got on the man inside, but he still feels downright disgusting right about now.

"Thanks for the save there fella. Would have hated to be trapped under that thing."

As the barbarians emerge, Iron Man hears a 'ping!' inside his helmet followed by yet another infodump.

"Tony, I've completed analysis. In addition to the mystical radiation emanating from the creature, there are also strong traces of tachyon particles..."

Inside the helmet, Tony's brow arches.

"... both from the creature, AND this... gentleman."

Thor has posed:
Thor is just as messy...Asgardians have many advantages in this world, but magical cleanliness is not on that list, and he's very much a mess at this point. Still, he exits the creature fundamentally agreeing with the sentiments of the warrior beside him. "I agree! Both bathing and feasting are much in need, for a great battle has been won. So...the wizard who summoned this thing...what can you tell us about him?"

If he gets enough info on that wizard, perhaps another wizard can be called in to battle him magic to magic.

Hulk has posed:
There's a growl as the body stops moving, and the resistance ebbs in front of him. The Hulk sniffs at the corpse as he twists the head this way and that -possibly with Thor and Conan still inside it- and then drops it with a *THUMP* to the ground. A hand moves up behind his head and ruffles it as he starts to step around the creature, examining it. "Hulk never seen this before, and Hulk has fight big monsters of all kinds. Usually made by Leader." Hulk gruffly comments, the deep bass of his voice rumbling.

As he steps around, the three tons of Jade Giant leave yet more small craters in the street, adding more damage to an already chaotic mess. "Goldilocks know what this is?" Hulk glances to Thor as he moves, his green uniform ripped here and there in places... and covered on monster spittle from being at the mouth of the thing.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
"Shield Bird, Sky Man, Wing Helmet, Green Puncher! You are all mighty companions," Conan calls to the assembled heroes. "I would count thee among my friends! I am Conan of Cimmeria, mercenary and thief. I am honored to have fought by the side of such powerful allies. Should you prove stalwart I will count you among my friends, and there is no greater friend than I!"

After a pause to breathe he goes on, "Riath Thalm is the wizard! He is known amongst his kind as the Sorcerer Supreme. Tonight I have found out that he is unkillable by means of splitting his skull in twain, but he has not been stabbed by me! That may work. Unfortunately, I have no means of tracking him. I wish to slay him and obtain his jewels and gold, for that will provide me with many days of leisure and plenty and prevent the summoning of any other monsters!"

Striding forward and sheathing his mighty blade, Conan goes on, "It is rumored that only a mighty weapon, assembled from the greatest artifacts of our age, the Hyborian Age, may cause his true death and prevent him from summoning Raze, an unstoppable god of destruction!"

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
The bird gives a slight smirk, which is... ok not normal, are beaks supposed to move like that? "Well, I would have hated having that job you just did so... there you go. Least I can do is keep you from getting squished." The raven replies, folding his wings as he just stands there casually.

He looks to the monster and listens in on what is being discussed and on the names being given out. "...Phantasm." He murmurs in reaction to 'Shield Bird'. Ok, so maybe not technically a 'name' but the description is a bit better. He doesn't say it much louder being everyone else got bad names as well. Besides the other title spoken out bears more concern.

The smile turns more into a frown, shaking his head, at the mention of a god of destruction "Oh...Strange isn't going to like this..."

Iron Man has posed:
"Huh."

It's not that Tony is exactly 'dumbfounded', more just that nothing in his recent past has prepared him for something exactly like this. If only there was a time portal conveniently nearby, they could push this guy back in and close whatever loop is no doubt about to occur due to his presence here.

"Hey uh... Hulk, Thor? Quick family meeting..."

Thor has posed:
Thor's first clue something is wrong is that Conan said 'sorcerer supreme', and then said 'Thalm.' He knows very well that's not the case, because the Sorcerer Supreme is named Steven Strange, and he's a personal friend. Still, the wizard who summoned this thing is obviously a problem and has to be dealt with.

"...What is it, Stark? ...and why does he speak of the evildoer wizard as...sorcerer supreme. That title is claimed by another." He wonders if something odd, magically, is going to happen with two claimants of that title.

Hulk has posed:
As he listens to Conan go on and on, Hulk scratches his head, "doesn't Magician use that title?" He notes, before he starts to walk over to Tony, his feet continuing to create small craters as he goes, his angry breathing heard easily through the block as he gets close enough to talk. "Hulk never heard of half the things Sword Man is saying. Sword Man may not be from human world."

Iron Man has posed:
Bringing it in close, Iron Man puts an armored gauntlet on a shoulder of each of the brawlers. Sure, he has to reach up to do this, but he's not insecure about this.

"Hey guys, I know you've bonded with your new buddy over violence and toxic masculinity... but I don't think that we can keep him. The data I've compiled by scanning him suggests that not only is he from the past, but that's his actual hair. Which means he chose that haircut. In the past."

Looking back over at Conan, Iron Man waves awkwardly before returning to the huddle.

"So uh... all in favor of getting rid of him?"

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
As the huddle forms, the raven glances up as the taller figures seem to form around him. His head tilts up. Head turning back and forth to look to the three of them. His beak opens but he doesn't say anything. Oh how hawkward.

Thor has posed:
Thor thinks about this. "...From the past? Timestreams are difficult, and I don't have the wisdom of Mimir to properly deal with that the way my father could. ...I'd recommend consulting Dr. Strange about his potential affect on the timestream...though if I remember right, traveling forward in time tends to cause less chaos than going back."

He could be wrong about that, though. Still, it makes some sense.

Hulk has posed:
"Magician will know if Sword Man shouldn't be here. Hulk doesn't care either way. Sword Man is funny." Hulk gruffly replies, "If Tin Man wants Sword Man gone, Hulk isn't stopping you."

As he finishes talking, Hulk turns and begins to walk down the street, away from the scene of the battle. He glances around briefly, before he crouches down just so, visibly getting ready for one of his continent spanning mega jumps.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
"What does your weapon do?" Conan is asking a police officer, the same one that faced down the giant before. "I would learn its workings from thee." Those who know history may know that there's almost no way the barbarian understands the concept of a police officer. "Wouldst thou give it to me? I will trade gold for it." That's... probably not remotely legal. The cop answers in the negative, thankfully for all involved, and Conan moves on to his next questions, "Where have I found myself, guardsman? This land is full of magic and mighty heroes."

The poor, unfortunate, lawman is not paid enough for this. Plus, shouldn't he be providing first aid to the injured and cordoning off the monster corpses? He goes to do that after excusing himself.

The barbarian wanders over towards Iron Man, "Sky Man, does thou know where we are? I fear Thalm has taken me far from where I was."

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
"In the yeaaar two thooouuusannnnd." The raven sings from the center of the huddle, mimicking an old Conan O'Brien bit before adding, "-twenty eight." Oh hey guys! Remember that raven with the stop sign? Yeah down here.

Iron Man has posed:
With the first responders taking care of what can unfortunately be called 'the cleanup', Iron Man has little left to do on the scene. Alert SHIELD and the Avengers, collate the data, come up with a plan. But all of that can be best done remotely.

That leaves only one little loose end to tie up for now, and the others seem to prefer that he did the tying.

Typical.

"Siiiiiiiigh."

The huddle is broken and Iron Man has been left with the Talking Part.

"Thanks for the assist, Phantasm. We owe you one. And uh... Conan, was it? Hey! Over here! Conan!"

Jogging over, metal boots clanking on the asphalt, Iron Man takes over for the poor cop.

"Listen there... uh... so my partners and I... that is... my uh... my Raiding Party here, we talked it over and..."

"Forsooth! Your arrival t'is truly a good omen! Because uh... Verily! We be a company of mighty warriors! Merry lads and buxom wenches, y'know, and we would surely be honored to entertain a stout warrior such as yourself in our... merriment fortress."

Iron Man looks back at Thor, as if hoping he did it right.

Thor has posed:
Thor decides to give it to him straight. "...Unfortunately, my friend, this evil wizard of yours took you through a portal in time. You are far in the future from your normal time, and the friends you once knew are long in the past. What can be done with magic can usually be undone with magic, and the wizard of this time is a noble protector of the realm. We will ask his aid when we can find him, for he is frequently off planet. ...It is likely he will be able to find your wizard. For if this 'Thalm' is Sorcerer Supreme of your time, our friend is Sorcerer Supreme of THIS time. It is unlikely two sorcerer supremes can exist for long without conflict."

As for what to do with him, he figures Tony generally has the right idea. "I agree...we should take him to the mansion. He should remain on Midgard for as long as his enemy does...while he'd fit in better in Asgard, it also makes it difficult for him to travel back and forth, so he must remain, that he may confront his enemy whereever he appears." Cause Thor's already guessed THAT is massively important to this man.

"Also, I am Thor Odinson, grandson of Bor, great grandson of Buri." He's hoping Conan recognizes one of those names, because that'll tell Thor roughly how far back in time Conan is fron.

Hulk has posed:
Without another word, the Hulk jumps. The area around him flattens and craters from the sheer strength Hulk uses to do it, and he's far up into the sky by the time anyone is looking his way.

Yep... Hulk is going far to the west for some reason. Even Iron Man will have a hard time keeping up with him.

Phantasm (Drago) has posed:
Phantasm gives a quirk of a smile, "I'm what you might call rare. Not many ravens talk, but they are smarter than most would think."

He glances to Tony, "I'll see what I can look up on this Thalm guy."

Giving a bit of a nod to the others, the raven turns and flies off towards the Greenwich area.

Conan the Cimmerian has posed:
"Two thousand twenty eight?" Conan asks the talking animal. "Shield Bird Phantasm, that number means nothing to me. Is this place named for that number?" At least he's taking the raven in stride. "I have seen many of your kind around battlefields, after the fighting is done, and have great respect for you. You are the first to speak to me, however. I would know if all your kind possess the power of speech."

"By Crom, this was a good battle!" He looks at the Avenging types and smiles. "I shall buy the first round, after I can find a place to bathe. We shall tell tales of our victories and have the bards sing of them!"

"Wing Helmet. Thor. Your hammer is great to call upon the storms themselves! Crom might even smile upon thee from his mountain top if you know him, Aesir, grandson of Bor. Surely your ancestor recognizes your might!" A frown appears on his face, "I must slay Thalm, or see him slain. He can't live in this or any other time. When I have done my duty I shall return."

"Sky Man, I shall let a warrior as mighty as yourself entertain me. Your company, especially the wenches, shall be most welcome. Let me spend what gold remains upon me in entertaining your band with the finest wines we can procure. Let the blood red drink quench our thirsts for spirits as we have just quenched our thirst for battle."

Watching Hulk leap off into the distance Conan will let out a low whistle, "I should learn where Green Puncher has learned to leap. Even my powers are not that mighty."

Then he says to Tony and Thor, "Let us be off! I must get the monster juices off of my skin lest I start to stink of it."

Thor has posed:
"Bor...my grandfather...he reigned between 12000 to 7600 years ago, when he finally fell in battle and Odin took over. If that is who you know in my family line, you have been taken very far forward in the future indeed." And with that 'pinning in time' he did, using his own family, that's got it settled.

"But yes, let us bathe, and eat, that we may be prepared for the battles ahead. Thalm is clearly a mighty wizard...but he chose poorly coming this far ahead in time, for this world has many noble heroes ready to do battle with wizards like him." And then, to the mansion!