2879/SHIELD Me from Disaster....

SHIELD Me from Disaster....
Date of Scene:	17 October 2017
Location:	Unknown
Synopsis:	Agents May & Johnson ask Tony for help and realize quickly that was probably a mistake...
Cast of Characters:	Iron Man, Quake, Melinda May

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Iron Man has posed:
Rain? No. Chilly? Yeah, it's getting colder outside and so he's in his office, sitting on the back of a sofa, his feet on the floor, his ass comfortably resting there on the black leather as he has a blue-tooth headset on. He's in slacks and a button up men's dress shirt, collar open, sleeves rolled up. He has a putter in his hand that he's swinging as he says, "No, I get that. And if I were asking you which of the Mitzy twins you wanted to go out with then yeah, I'd let you pick first and I'd go second. But this isn't the Mitzy twins. This is a bit more important so...wait hold on," he says as his door opens to allow in the visitors. "Yeah...I'll call you back. I'm not messing around on this one. It needs to go right and this is what I want. Awesome..." he says and claps his hands together before pointing his putter at the two SHIELD agents walking in. "You two...who goes there?"

Quake has posed:
Normally Skye would bow to Agent May's directives in this, but it was something of her show. They'd both agreed that Stark Industries might be able to help. It was all part of the last minute workings on what Skye hoped would land them a decisive strike against Hydra. She'd never actually worried this much about a hack before. It was telling that she was taking such care with this one - even if she wouldn't admit why.

She and Tony had a burgeoning history, though, one that left the agent in training offering him a crooked little smirk of lips. "Wouldn't you like to know. Though I didn't bring lunch. Just my Senior Officer. She wouldn't let me stop on the way for groceries."

Which was an outright lie. She hadn't even asked May if they could stop. Even if now that they were here, it didn't strike her that it would have been another amusing twist on the game she and Tony seemed to be playing of irritating one another and seeing who called Uncle first.

Melinda May has posed:
May stands silently next to Skye, watching Stark and that putter in particular. If he (unintentionally, of course) swings that thing too close to her or Skye, she'll snatch it away from him. For everyone's safety, of course. The hacker's quip about not stopping for groceries will most definitely be commented upon later, but for now she lets it slide.

And sometimes, the most reliable way to annoy the snot out of someone is to NOT react to anything at all.

Iron Man has posed:
Tony Stark looks over and smiles, "Agent Orchid....Agent May," he says, and there's one good thing about Tony. If anyone ever questioned if he had any good sense in his skull, you can tell he has at least some as he straightens up a bit at May's arrival. "To what do I owe the pleasure? Apparently it's not an offer for wine tasting or such, though I do know an excellent place," he says pleasantly before looking back to the pair of SHIELD agents. "I didn't accidentally fly over a no fly zone again did I? I mean I keep doing that. You'd think they'd be better marked....or that I'd have installed something in my suit taht would tell me when I was over one..."

To which a somewhat robotic and somewhat British sounding voice, speaks up. <<You have sir...me. Every time...>>

Tony looks to the wall and points the golf club menacingly before turning back to the two of you and trading the couch for the front of his desk as a buttrest, he crosses his feet at the ankles and leans the putter up against the desk.

Quake has posed:
Skye's grin remains. "You're going to run out of flowers at this rate, and then what are you going to do? Nice call on not hitting us with the golfball, by the way. And remind me not to fly with you."

She does relent some, schooling her smirk into something less irreverent as she moves further into his office. "Actually, it's official business today. If we can have a moment of your time, off the record, that is?"

Melinda May has posed:
Again matching Skye's movement as the younger agent steps fully into Tony's office, May then takes one step slightly to the side and offers Stark a small nod acknowledging his exceedingly respectful (for him) greeting.

Maybe Skye should have asked to stop for groceries. May's no stranger to having to cook for herself. She's by no means a secret gourmet, but she can put ingredients together and have the results be edible.

Iron Man has posed:
Tony Stark oooohs, "Official business, off the record. JARVIS! Quick, pretend you're not recording any of this...." says Tony with a hint of a smile on his features and he pushes the blue-tinted glasses he's wearing up on his nose a bit, the frames rectangular shaped and his eyes easy to see beneath as he looks to the pair. "Alright..." he says. "First one of you two to tell me what you're doing here gets an all expense paid trip to...NEW YORK CITY! Seriously...." he says, "I was in the middle of some very important totally personal matters that have nothing to do with me setting up a date for someone and like the typical government institution you are, you just barge on in...." and so he gets off his playfully phrased high horse and moves to one of his chairs, crossing one leg over the other, resting his elbow on his knee, and his chin on his palm. "Go ahead. This is my officlal business face. Officiate."

Quake has posed:
Skye crinkles her nose up at him. "You could have left us wither in the lobby." A quick glance is cast May's way, then back to Tony. "I need your help," the young woman says simply. She waits for him to take that and throw it back at her in the fashion to which she's become accustomed to their dealings going. "Possibly Jarvis' as well."

Melinda May has posed:
The fact that May is even here while Skye asks for Stark's help should be indication enough that she's been authorized by SHIELD to even be here asking. It's also an indication of how dire the reason for the request must be, really, considering how fond Fury is of asking for help of anyone. Especially Stark.

Likely as a gesture to indicate this is by no means a subtle version of strongarm tactics, she moves to sit in the nearest available chair, either unconsciously or very intentionally crossing her legs in near-mimicry of Tony.

Iron Man has posed:
Tony Stark looks to May. "When I do it it's charming, even clearly disarming. When you do it...I think you're going to kill me," he says. Though the list of things May does that make Tony pretty sure she wants to kill him is far too long for the logs. So, moving past that, Stark sits up a bit and looks to Skye-Daisy-Orchid-Gardenia-Buttcerup (so far her list of names). "Alright. You mentioned me, and JARVIS, and you brought along one of the good guys who still gives me the heebie jeebies, so I'll buy that it's serious and dispense with all the things I usually do. Tell Fury I was as annoying as ever and it was like pulling teeth. But what is it? Lay it on me."

Quake has posed:
"Oh, she's here to make sure I behave." Skye's lips give that familiar twist of a grin, but the thing is shortlived. May's presence likely just what it seems, to lend credence to what Skye's about to ask, and given her past, and the possibility Stark may have even moderate knowledge of it, she might very well need that vote of confidence.

"I have a bug up Hydra's ass that I can't lose. I get one shot at it, so it has to count. I'm pulling in all the favours I can, and as far as tech goes, you're about the best there is. They rammed themselves into our mainframe and I followed them home. It's a sleeper right now. I need help creating a smokescreen when I go in.."

And here she pauses before laying the rest of it out there, "Once I do this, they're going to know I'm working for SHIELD. Unless we can get in and out faster than they can identify me, and even then it's a longshot. But you can help buy us enough time to at least get the information we need."

Iron Man has posed:
Tony Stark looks back and forth between the two. "That's it? I have like, a super army of nerdiness and yeah...." he says with a chuckle. "I'm pretty sure we can help with that. Though I'm surprised you're asking....ohhhhh wait, no I'm not. The whole who's on their side thing, you probably can't go through normal channels cause then you run the risk of them finding out. So you need someone who, if he does get caught...I mean go figure, he hacked Hydra. Of course AN AVENGER would do that. So you need less Tony Stark and more Iron Man in this case. Which i'm fine with though as good as I am, Natasha's better. Natasha using my tech...probably off the charts. I'm fine with it and I'm fine helping but if you want this done right I strongly suggest you bring her in on it."

He gives a shrug, "My two cents at least. But yeah, I'm fine with that. You go to your little dark corner of the interwebs where people who don't like kitten videos and child molesters hide and do your thing, and I'll help Natasha make a distraction so big that you'd think....I dunno...someone famous and prudish but cute looking just posed for a magazine that is not prudish." He looks to May, "Seriously, all my mojo, my witty lines. Just poof. Do you have this effect on everyone?"

Quake has posed:
"Agent Romanova?" Skye blinks in surprised appreciation. "Wow. Not what I would have pegged. Candidate for longest stick up someone's butt and still able to sit behind a desk, but seriously? Computer whiz?" She shakes her head a few times, still parsing that one. "Oh, wait, you don't mean that kind of distraction, do you?"

The last bit of his discourse gets a full on smirk again. "She cracked a smile when she shot me in the ass."

Melinda May has posed:
May lets Skye spell out what they need, knowing the CEO and inventor will far better understand the technobabble than she ever will. Maybe it's for the best that way. From what she's seen of the kid's hacking, she'd probably wind up punching the computer in frustration.

Then he mentions Romanoff and... she really should have thought of that herself. "We'll read her in." And if May says it, it shall be done.

"And do you really want to know the answer to that, Stark?" It's kind of fun watching the man get perturbed by the fact that she can't be visibly perturbed. She should make a bet with someone on how long it'll actually take for him to wise up to her.

Iron Man has posed:
Tony Stark looks at Skye and chuckles. "If you think that Nat's one skill is kicking ass, then that's about the same as my thinking your one skill is picking out wines. It's grossly understated. But yeah, you figure out when and how and I'll make sure she's got all the resources she needs. You just make sure that you're on your A-Game. Last thing I need is all of Stark Industries awesome computer secrets being leaked to the web because they already turned around your little mole and are waiting for you to reach out to it," he says, someowhat actually seriously but then he stands up and looks to May. "I have a better idea. Next time you have an afternoon off, why dont' we fly to Shanghai and actually pick up some authetnic cuisine that neither of us has to cook and we can discuss Agent Petunia's likelihood of making it out of pleeb status."

Quake has posed:
Skye rolls her eyes. "Great, I get proscuitto at the desk and she gets Shanghai."

It's only a momentary complaint, though, the young woman nothing but serious in return to his admonition about Nat and his computers. "I have plans for them if they have. And backup systems.. Woah, wait, I'll have you know the Director heavily implied I should get a promotion out of this. Pleeb my ass. If it weren't for me they'd have taken a larger chunk of our mainframe home with them. And I got to the door with nothing but paint on my ass. I'll put my skills against yours anyday smartass, and I'll even buy the wine out of my own paycheque to boot should I lose."

Melinda May has posed:
Oh boy. Skye's hackles are up. Time to leave. "I'll hold you to that, Stark. Shanghai, and I choose the restaurant." She moves to stand. "But we'll more likely be discussing how you can apologize to Agent Johnson for doubting her skills. In the meantime, we'll head back to HQ and I'll make sure that you get the hardware specs for a standalone system."

Because there is no way in hell May is letting Skye try to pick up on her mole program using SI's systems directly. She is NOT about to risk so much as a hint of a threat anywhere close to JARVIS. The AI is probably one of a very few reasons why Stark has never gone full-blown supervillain.