3133/You can do it, we can help

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You can do it, we can help
Date of Scene: 11 November 2017
Location: Home Depot
Synopsis: Jean Grey has a run in at the Home Depot that she's not likely to forget.
Cast of Characters: Deadpool, Phoenix




Deadpool has posed:
Still humming to the tune of 'When Johnny Comes Marching Home', Deadpool pushed a comically overflowing shopping cart down the aisle. The front left wheel wasn't rolling properly, causing him to have some trouble steering, and the rear right wheel was sitting slightly above the floor, as the cart wasn't balanced anymore. But other than that, and the missing piece of the plastic on the front, and the rust on the steering handle, the Merc with the Mouth had a real keeper of a shopping cart. It had been through the wars, and there was no substitute for decades of experience. Most of the staff at the Home Depot were wondering where he found such an old cart, and in such a state of disrepair. That thought had permeated the store, as he went through aisle after aisle, adding more to his cart. The superhero costume was somehow seen as less strange than the state of his cart, or what was in it.


Phoenix has posed:
There were times it didn't pay to work at a school. Today was one of them. While they multitude of residents at the mansion could do any number of miraculous things, apparently fixing the plumbing was not a power any of them possessed. A few of them had the knowledge but they required the materials necessary to make the repair. Being the boss left her as the gopher.

Jean's cart is pristine. They must have gotten in some new ones as there isn't a scratch on it, all four wheels work perfectly and it glides across the floor with minimal effort on her part. There are a wide range of pipes, fixtures and joints already in the basket and she has a list in her left hand she is consulting as she pushes her way around the corner to start on tne next aisle.

Directly into the path of the cart from the 1900s.

Deadpool has posed:
Deadpool's cart stops in its tracks, but is otherwise unharmed. The items in his cart barely even jostle. That's why he went with the little cart that could. It was tougher than it looked. Or it could be that Deadpool's cart had some serious weight in it, while Jean's was light by comparison. But Wade preferred to attribute the win to his trusty old cart as Jean's bounces off of his and slips towards her with a little bit of force.

Deadpool, who was wearing white overalls over his suit, and a painter's cap, which was also white, moved around his cart to ask, "are you okay?" His clothes were old too, though nowhere near as old as the cart. They had just been used for work, especially painting by the little bits of red, grey, blue, green, and the rest of the rainbow.

Then he tilted his head, "just a second, I think someone's paging me." But there was nothing coming over the store's intercom. He wasn't vibrating either, at least not that she could tell, and really, would she want to argue with him about that.


Phoenix has posed:
As Jean's cart bounces off his, she reaches out with a little TK to keep it from slamming back into her. It comes to a full and complete stop without pushing her backwards a step in the process. She blinks upon seeing who she is talking to. Twice. That's...different. She starts to open her mouth to answer his question but is told to hold on. She tilts her head, listening for a page but there is nothing. As old as his cart is, he might have one of those 1980s pagers somewhere on his person but she can't hear it so maybe he meant something else. She's not really sure.

"I'm very sorry. I was looking at my list instead of where I was going," she says apologetically although she is feeling a slight bit of tension when she realizes who it is in front of her. She's seen his image at least although they haven't met in person. "You have visited my school recently. Unannounced."

Deadpool has posed:
Even through the mask, somehow Deadpool is able to emote blushing. His cheeks move, his face in that pronounced way, and his body language suggests embarrassment, "oh, yeah, right, sorry... but I honestly thought that was a washroom." He did something bad there. But that's probably not what she was referring to, if she even knew what he was talking about.

"But in my defence," he sounded more confident there, and even had an exaggerated hand gesture, "there was plenty of lotion. And if it wasn't a washroom, then why all the lotion?" Of course, with that school, it could be some unfortunate student who needed to buy lotion by the litre.

Peering over at her cart, he smiled, "see, looks like you're putting in a new toilet, or at least something to do with plumbing? Need a hand? I'm very handy, and far cheaper than the bonded people. I used to charge, until someone explained to me that I have to actually know how to do something before I can charge for it. But I have a can do attitude!" And he held out his hands, thumbs up, and winked, as if he were looking at a camera, but he was just looking at a pallet of Christmas trees.


Phoenix has posed:
Jean's brow furrows a bit at his statement. Confession? What in the world is he talking about? Washroom. Lotion. She frowns a bit now as she considers the things he is saying. Or not saying. Now she's getting very nervous about having him on the campus. Then he is volunteering to help?

"No, thank you. We have people who can handle the repairs, thus why I'm here with a list." She holds up her left hand where she is holding a small piece of paper. "I would appreciate if you have business with the school, you clear your visits with the administration before simply appearing there. We have students to think of and protect." Especially from crazy people giving thumbs up to trees.

She reaches into the back pocket of her jeans and pulls out a folding case with business cards. One is removed and offered to him. "The number there is for the school and the cell is for me personally. So you can call ahead next time?"

Deadpool has posed:
Deadpool listened and followed along, nodding his head when appropriate. He seemed to understand and agree to everything she was saying, right up until she said that she was giving him her personal number, "oh, sure, I can, uh, call ahead next time." Of course, for Wade, that meant calling, and then teleporting there seconds later, or maybe even while he's on the phone. Somehow Weasel had managed to work out a teleporter that didn't drop his calls. He had better reception than any of the big carriers. He's pretty sure Weasel had hacked into a Wayne satellite. Wayne Enterprises always did seem to have the best toys.

"But, uh, Jean, you're very beautiful, and lovely, but I have a girlfriend. I just wanted that to be up front. I'm a one man mercenary. I know, a soldier of fortune with a conscience, go figure. Now, it's a school right. When do I start teaching?" Poor Jean, Professor Xavier never taught her how to handle someone like Deadpool. How could he have?


Phoenix has posed:
It's Jean's turn to blush as she shakes her head adamantly. "No, no. I'm not giving you my number to...give you my /number/. It's for business purposes only. For the protection of the children, it is better if you notify us before your arrival is all," she finishes hurriedly. "You will not be teaching. Or fixing anything. Really, I'm not sure why you came to the school in the first place."

Placing her hands on the handle of her cart, she frowns again as she pulls her buggy just a few inches away from the crazy man. "Why were you at the school anyway?"

Deadpool has posed:
Raising his hand when Jean begins to blush and backtrack, "it's okay. Don't sweat it. If I weren't with someone, I would have totally been into you. You're beautiful, charming, great with children, and really smart. You'd have to be to become Vice Principal of a school like Xavier's. And at such a young age. You're totally a catch. Any single man, and some women, would be into you." Yeah, he just sort of kept on like that... for some time.

When she informed him that no, he won't be teaching, or fixing things around the school, he kept trying to play it cool. "It's okay, I understand. Can't control yourself around me? I'm sorry you feel that way, but I definitely understand it." But when she inquires to why he spends so much time around the school, he looks around, making sure that no one's looking, and curiously, so that his back is to the security cameras. He then makes an 'X' with his two index fingers, "I wanna be a man. I've been working really hard, and think I'd be a great addition to the team."


Phoenix has posed:
The alarm bells go off in Jean's head as she realizes this costumed lunatic knows that the X-Men are related to the school. She plays it cool. Her expression never changes. "I have no idea what you are talking about," she says simply with a shrug. Getting a firm grip on the handle of her cart, she pulls it around and aims it back the direction she had been coming from in the first place. "If you will excuse me, I need to finish shopping and get back there." She's made up her mind that if he shows up again, there will be quite an in depth discussion about his intentions. But Home Depot is not the place for that talk.

Too many things are flammable.

Deadpool has posed:
"No? You haven't died recently? Resurrections aren't too good for the old noggin. Believe me, I should know. But yeah, you've got pipes to lay, or you know, whatever. I'm cool." He reaches for the handles of his old worn out shopping cart and attempts to get it moving again. It takes some force, given the weight it's carrying and the wonky wheels. By the time he does the darned thing moving, she's gone. With the cart moving, he returned to humming his little tune, singing to himself, "... you tried to invade, we shot you down, we burned your White..." and then he sees something, grabbing it, "ooh, propane. I need some of that."