4564/Memory Lane

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Memory Lane
Date of Scene: 02 June 2018
Location: Unknown
Synopsis: Wanda talks with Nolan about difficult subjects. Things.. turn out just fine.
Cast of Characters: Scarlet Witch, Deadwatch




Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda didn't know how to tell Nolan.

It wasn't that Nolan was the hardest talk she had to give - Vision won that one hands down - but Nolan scored a very close second. And, in truth, he was the one she was most worried about. Whereas she had no doubt about her love for him, she now also had memories of the same feelings sitting within her for Vision, and while they were strange to her, they also came will full-fledged memories attached - memories that solidified the more she thought on them.

And given that she'd spent time trying to explain all this matter to Vision, and her father, and the boys, she'd had some practice in the past couple of days in thinking on the matter. In short, Wanda knew in her heart of hearts that she loved two men, even if she knew she'd only actually lived the actuality of one of them. And that one of them she couldn't avoid talking to about this matter any longer.

So it is that she drops in on Nolan, coming with dinner and drinks. A surprising Italian feast, complete with wine - which she knows he might not like, but also brought several of those cute little taster bottles of something stronger for Nolan to drink. Plus he was never without of his own. This was merely a nod to his preferences.

As per usual, she doens't knock, merely shows up inside his dwelling, bags of takeout in hand, and calls out, "Nolan? You are here?"

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight is most definitely here.. It /is/ his place, after all. The ginger psyhic sits in the corner of his couch, which itself is stuffed into the corner, his his braced leg propped up on the coffee table. Papers with arcane symboles are strewn on both the table and the floor below him, alighted in patterns maybe.. or maybe it's just some haphazard accident.

He looks up when he hears her voice, and raises a brow. "Yes. I'm here." he calls out moments after she materializes, and raises a brow at her offerings... The dinner, that is. "Wait... did I forget you were coming over tonight or something?" he asks, cautiously.. because he could easily have dome something like that... "Because if I did, I am soooo sorry.. I got caught up in this research..and there was an epidemic of losucts this afternoon I had to deal with.. Biblical Locusts.."

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda's smile for Nolan is gentle, and pleased - even though it is his home, and she has no reason to expect that he should not be there, still it always is something of a surprise when he is when she shows up. And that he has never once chided her for not entering in a more conventional fashion. "No, we did not have plans. Only it is that I feel I have been avoiding you for some days.. I did bring us supper?"

She holds up the bags to show him.

"Wait, Biblical locusts? I did think they were.. well.. biblical?" As in not real. A story. Only she flushes faintly as she says it, realizing how silly that sounds, and how if she thinks on it but a moment longer, she knows full well that they are real. As are so many things most think are but myth and lore.

"It is okay that I came?" Suddenly uncertain.

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight looks relieved, because he is so not experienced in this relationship thing and everything he knows casme from television so... yeah. He sets down a steno-pad bearing his really bad penmenship and offers a wry smile. "Well I didn't really feel you were /avoiding/ me, lovely... but who am I to turn down such an apology." he jests.

As she walks around to the couch, bags in hand, Nolan chuckles slightly. "Someone was trying to fullfill some biblical prophecy.. or self fullfill it anyways. Some weekend satanist and his 'coven'. Really, it wasn't a big deal except for the bugs. I don't even think they were real locusts but standard grasshppers. It was rather pathetic." he says with a snort.. then raises a brow.

"You know you are /always/ welcome. SO that means it is /always. Okay. The question is, are /you/ okay?"

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda comes to the couch, and perches on the other, free, end, a bag placed between them, the other upon the floor. "I did think it was okay. At least I did see that the magic always does let me in. It did seem to think about it the first time. Did you know that?"

Her fingers play along the fold of the bag holding the food. The bag with drinks set beside her.

"It is that I am okay," she begins. "It is much easier to talk of you. At least today. And I am wondering why someone would want to bring the Bible to life. Sometimes I wonder that they do not understand that there are so many stories that were once there in its pages that are gone now. It is almost not even the same book it once was."

She looks over at Nolan, drinking in his oh, so familiar features. "Only that is me trying not to talk about the difficult thing, yes? I did bring us food, and some wine. I thought we could have a date here, and maybe it would be better than those couples who try to talk about the difficult in public and it always does go bad, yes?"

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight runs a finger through his hair, smirking a little. "YOu do realize that my wards aren't all magical, right?" he asks her. "So it wasn't that the wards were 'thinking' about it the first time. This place is also guarded by.. well.. spirits and a few ghosts. /They/ were the ones thinking on it." he admits to her. And of course he would have ghosts watching his place. "Some of them can be a bit.. possessive of me..."

He watches as she manhandles the fold of the bag, catching that bit of body language but.. doesn't push. Not yet. Instead he answers he question. "Why does anyone want to fulfill any prophecy? Because it makes them feel powerful or important.. special. Like they had a hand in 'Destiny', which is nonsense.They don't care WHAT prophecy they try to fulfill, just that there is on to fulfill." he says as he leans back into the cushions and looking her directly in the eye.

"Yeah, I could tell there is something you want to talk about, and are having trouble actually bringing up.. You're tense and deflecting.." he says, though not at all being critical of it. He is just pointing it out with a smirk. "I would be afraid you were breaking up with me, what with the food and the wine, but usually you only break up that way in restaurants, not in someones home so... Whats up?"

Scarlet Witch has posed:
There's an almost panic in Wanda's eyes as she lifts the green of them to the mismatched brown and blue of his own, "Oh! No, I do not wish to break up with you..." Only now that he has said it, she has a sudden clench of fear in her chest. "You do wish to break up with me?"

Her teeth worry at her lower lip as she considers that. Distracting herself with thinking upon what he has said of his wards, and managing a faint smile. "I did not quite know that. It all seemed much that.. well, I did not scry very hard. It is your house, and it is rude to pick at someone's magic that way - especially if you have come to tell them that you love them. But they did seem to not mind that I had come."

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight ois and rolls his mismatched eyes and wags a finger at her. "No, I do not want to break up with you, you silly girl." he chides her, though smiles with amusement.. a bit /embarrased/ amusement but still amusement. "I still wonder what you see in me, lovely, but I am not STUPID enough, nor suicidal enough, to break up with the best thing that ever happened to me."

He then sits up a bit and reaches for the bag between them, unrolling the fold to look in. "And if you had scryed harder, you would have seen a hodepodge of different woven wards of differnt disciplines, with some strange holes in te overall pattern. because Scry as much as you wish, lovely, unless you have the 'Eye' most ghosts cannot be seen even /with/ magic." he says. He then looks up at you and grins. "When you are around me, though.. yeah, sometimes you can. And don't worry. Most of them seem to like you.... But once again, we're deflecting. What has you all tense?"

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda gives a tiny, pleased smile at the mention that she seems to be liked by *most* of them. "I am glad. It would not be nice if they were angry that I did like you, and did mean things like hid my shoes, or pinched me when I did try to be close to you."

Which only serves to make her smile more, for some reason.

She thrusts the bag over. "First, we take out the food and we pretend that this is only dinner. Then I will tell you what it is I did come to say. And no, it is not to break up. It is.. it is difficult, though, and I am not certain that you will be happy with me once you do hear it all. Only you do need to hear."

She leaves the food bag for him, while she deals with the drinks, pulling the wine bottle out of the bag, as well as the small samplers of various hard liquors. The wine she proceeds to pour into a glass for herself (why, yes, there just happened to be a glass waiting), and she considers the prospect of wine for him or the small bottles. "Do you have a preference?" Already pushing the small collection of miniatures to his side of the coffeetable, such as it is.

Deadwatch has posed:
When she turns around the food is already dispensed, plated and everything,. It's actually rather something since one would never think that the cripple was /that/ quick/ Seems sometimes even he is capable of surprises. of course, magic /does/ help too..

"Wine will do for me, lovely." he tells her, then awaits her to sit down again. "And if you wish to pretend this is only dinner, then you might as well ask me to not think about white elephants. When you ask someone to do something, they usually can't help bt do it." he reinds her with a faint grin. "So maybe just be out with it, hmmm?

Scarlet Witch has posed:
The small bottles remain within his reach, but it's clear she's pleased he's willing to have wine with her, and a second glass is poured, and handed over, her own taken up and touched lightly to his. "To white elephants. Only, I think it is always pink in the stories? Or is that if you have had too much to drink? I can not remember."

Wanda nods, though, and does not sip, instead taking a slow breath that she exhales carefully. "I did learn a thing the other day. I did find that I have two boys. Two very grown boys. It is complicated, and now that I have seen them, I do remember how they did come to be, and why, and it was me, but it was also not me.. and I am so sorry, Nolan. I did not know of it, and it is.." Her gaze drops, and she admits the elephant she fears the most, "I remember loving him. I remember that I do love him. And now, because I have given it to him, he remembers me. I did not do it to hurt you."

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight touches her glass to hers, smiling, and takes a sip... And then coughs JUST a little as her admission comes spewing out in a ramble. He gahs and picks up a napkin, wiping his lips.. his chin.. his lap.. Then stares at her with wide and.. curious eyes.

"Wait wait wait.. lets back up here a bit.." he says quickly... Then his brow furrows. "You have /kids/?" he asks, slowly.. "How? I mean aren't you.. you know..?" he makes an uncomfortable hand motion... "Well.. A virgin?" Because thats what he thought she told hi and they really haven't crossed that.. hurdle.. yet...

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda watches Nolan take that sip.. and then choke on that very sip, nearly spewing it. "See? I did say it was complicated. It is that.. well, that Wanda that was me there was not. Only, he is not like you - he is not human.. so she did make them. So it would not so much mattered if she had or hadn't, because that did not really come into how the boys were conceived.. and.." her cheeks flush prettily. "Why have we not slept together?"

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight almost seems to.. relax.. when she tries to explain just how it happened. The kids. Sure, soe people might look at such a story, especially one as vague, as being somewhat incredious but considering the world that Nolan lives in.. well.. He slumps a bit and then wgas his finger again. "Thats all then?" he asks, like it was something so very simple. "An alternate version of you and some other not-human guy had babies? Thats what had you all scared to tell me?" he asks. "I though it was something /weird/."

His eyes glimmer ever so slightly... teasing.

Then his cheeks flush and he looks away. "Why haven't....? Is it a problem that we haven't?" he asks slowly. "I mean, it's not that I haven't wanted to.. I just..."

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda blinks at Nolan when his reaction to her (to her, when cconsidering the possible ramifications if he didn't take it well, devestating news) is so mild. It leaves her confused. "I do not understand? I did tell you I made babies with another man and you are okay?" But when he pokes fun, saying he thought it was something 'weird', even she has to giggle. "Oh, Nolan. It is weird. I did just.. make them be. Like babies, only he is not human, so I did make them from him and me by making all the parts that should have been him."

Her nose crinkles thinking about it. "They did turn out very much like Pietro, which is somehow disturbing, but maybe not so much when you do think we are identical." And here she looks thoughtful again. "Did you know that? That you can have identical twins who are a boy and a girl? It is rare, but possible."

Only it is the rest of what he says that leaves her suddenly shy again, and so very aware of why so much of this could have gone south so very fast.

"No," she answers carefully. "It is not a problem. Only we do never talk about it. I did think you were uncomfortable, so I did not do the pushing. I am not totally sure how to do the pushing, but I am not sad that we do wait. Only, I think some would not believe we do not."

She pauses, and prompts gently, "Only you just...?"

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight is trying to keep up, since there are actually two very VERY different conversations going on here, whether or not they might have some BARELY connective tissue. That being the.. act of procreation. Ahem. He quickly tries to figure out which one to address first.. The easier one. Her Babies. It's sad when the scenario regarding your lovers alternate reality children is easier to talk about then.. the other thing.

"No.. It's not /that/ weird. I mean, yeah its a /bit/ weird but. There are an infinite number of worlds out there right? And dimensions. Which aren't the same thing really but you know what I mean.." he takes a breath. "I can't get mad that a version of you had feelings for someone, even if they aren't.. human. I can't get mad if you had had relations with someone else /here/ before we met. That other-you somehow helped create these kids, using magic I would guess unless your other-self was a genetisist, if a BIT weird but it's not like using magic to bolster fertility or even create life is uncommon even here.. I mean, look at Jesus.. or Darth Vader. The whole thing about them being a lot like you and your /brother/.. thats strange.. but..." he shrugs a bit.

He then takes a deep breath again and looks her in the eye. "it's not that I am uncomfortable about.. it." he says. "Not in the sense that I don't want it. I do. Oh god you don't know how much I do. Those nights where I..." he stops suddenly, his face Very red now.. He quickly looks away. "I mean.. *cough*.. I just.. I'm scared." he finally admits. "That I will do it wrong.. or something. That I will.. fail to 'perform' right."

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Indeed, it is strange when it's easier to talk about the metaphysics of reality and your place in them.. and how you created children as an alter self.. than it is to address the other white elephant in the room, that being the how and when and why not of consumating that portion of your relationship. And like Nolan, she tackles the easier one first.

"It is that she is me. I mean, that I am she? We are all me, Nolan. Only I am only ever aware of one of me at one time. I think that is how it is. I know what it is I did do there because the children are here and we crossed paths."

"I /am/ their mother by all measures that can be taken. I remember doing it. Creating them. How, and why, and when, and even all the sorrow about sending them away. I remember loving him, and being with him in all the ways I imagine we shall be some day, only it is very strange that I can also remember a time when I did not hold these memories."

Her lips curl up at the edges and she gives a soft laugh. "I am not Darth Vader. I do not think I could do the voice." Though she tries, giving a very good go of it, "Billy, I am your mother.."

The laughter slips away, and her glass is put down, Wanda holding out a hand. "Oh, Nolan, how is it that I made you afraid to be with me? Afraid that you might do a thig wrong, when it is always that there are two of us. And I do not know if there is a way to do it wrong? Do you think I only love you for what you can do that way? Because I would be happy to wait always for you. It is that I love you, not what your genitals can do. Though I do imagine it would also be nice."

And again her cheeks pinken, perhaps fueled by that alter-reality's awareness of just now nice such a thing may be.

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight flushes furiously now, looking down at his hands... weaving his fingers in and around each other nervously... Too many different threads in the conversation for him to fully keep up with now. Alternate Wandas and children and how the multiverse interacts with itself in it's chaotic way and, of course, physical intimacy and his fears of inadequacy..

"Yes you are their mother yet you are not..." he tells her, choosing this thread first. "We're /all/ part of.. of other selves. You're just a bit more cognicent then most people. But just because you remember doing this.. as the other you... doesn't mean you are /responsible/ for what happened or the results. What if another you, in another universe did something bad? Like, I dunno.. Genocide or something? Would that make the You, here, responsible for that Wanda's actions just because you shared memories? No. because that is what the multiverse is for. To show us all the possibilities. But that doesn't make any of us responsible for every possibility. Only for the actions we do in /this/ frame of existence, not what the other us do next door.. Be their mother, yes, if they show up hee.. But not /that/ mother."

That said he sets his hands in his lap and looks at her, changing the track to the next one and inhaling deeply calm himself. "I am not afraid to be with you. I am afraid of /me/. Because I want it, /you/, so badly that it scalds. I know you don't love me for only one reason, but I truthfully don't know what to do. I mean.. I know what to do.. I've done it a log time ago.. I think about it often.. but it's hard to take that step.. by myself."

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda, too, find the multiple threads more of a hindrance than a help. Certainly they distract one topic from another, but the net result is that each conversation continually winds around itself without resolving. She can follow Nolan's lead, though.

"I do not know if it is that simple? Does being aware not mean that I have responsibility?" She doesn't *quite* come out and say, yet, that she thinks this is her purpose - to be all those things, and becaause they are her purpose, that they are also her responsibility. It's a hard enough concept for her to grasp, let alone to try and explain it to another.

"I.. it is you will be okay if I do wish to be their mother? It will not harm us?" While she might not be willing to abandon the boys for this love of hers, neither does she want them to destroy what she is building with Nolan. And she notes that they both ignore the awkwardness that is the boy's father. Though that is a thing she suspects she must figure out with Vision and herself first. At the very least with herself.

She smiles, though, when Nolan speak, at last, of the two of them together. "I can not imagine scalding someone with my love. Or my need. You make it sound something both terrifying and wonderful all at once."

There's an absent nod to her as she listens to his words. His concerns. And lastly, what she thinks is his plea to her. The flush that had lain upon her cheeks has long settled, and left her with nothing but a remnant - a glow of innocence. "I do not understand why you are afraid of you. But I think I know what you are saying? You wish to know it is what I wish, too? Like the kisses?" There's a soft trill of laughter from her. "And I do love you for many things. I do not think I can love you for that when it is not a thing we have yet to do, no? It should be so much easier. Would it help to know I do wish it? To be with you that way?"

Deadwatch has posed:
Resolution.. ugh.. why is resolution of anything so damned hard. The cripple wants to smack his head against a wall, to get hi out of these cycles, these loops he finds himself in.. Maybe it's time to start trying to bring some of these threads back together.. to to tie them up, if you will...

"No. Being aware means you have a responsibility to what /you/ think you should do, not what other-you did. if you want to be their mother, Wanda, and no it would not harm us in the slightest, then do it because you /want/ to.. Not because you feel responsible for Other-Possible-Wanda.. I will stand by your choice, regardless, but do it for /THIS/ Wanda." he says, sincerely...

Now.. for the more difficult thread.. since he hopes he helped tie that other one up enough for her. "If I knew why I was afraid.. Why I was /really/ afraid.. Then I wouldn't /be/ afraid, Wanda.." he says softly.. Yes, I do want to know what it is you wish, because you wants are just as important as my own.. More so even. And I want you.. in every sense of the word..." he rasps... Then shivers as she admits her own wish... "And yes.. Yes it does.."

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda's features light up with a gentle smile. "I do wish to be their mother," she says simply, without revisiting whether or not she agrees with how he sees her part in this, or her place in the multiverses. "I would not be who I wish to be if I could know they were and ignore them."

It's the simplest and easiest answer. And it's the one that makes her feel most in tune with herself and her place in the world. Whether or not she set them in motion, this her is where they are to be now, and it is a responsibility she takes gladly, but not lightly.

She waits until Nolan is done, and graces him with another of her smiles, if a shy one. To her, his words make it seem all so simple. The simpler of the two questions - even if it isn't for him. "I do understand. So we will simply say that it is scary to love someone, and to be vulnerable. And we will say that I wish you in all the ways as well. I am not so sure how it is to do this, but we can figure it out together?"

Her lips are licked, and she watches him. Her own worries now coming into play, despite that shiver and rasp from him. Despite all that she is, what if she isn't enough?

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight exhales lowly and shakily nods, his freckles dusted cheeks reddening. "Yes.. Yes we can agree on that..." he says and reaches over and rests his hand, the scarred heavily one, on hers. The fingers shake slightly, less from fear and more from the damaged nerves, but he doesn't pull it back. He fixes his mismatched eyes on her and notes the aprehension, the anxiety, and realizes they probably match his own.. What a pair they are, right?

"Together then.... yes.." he says, and just saying it.. together.. it makes him roil and bubble inside in ways that he has never felt till recently. "Maybe the easiest way is to just... do it? Like.. like jumping into cold water? pulling off a bandaid? Just.. just get it over with...?"

Scarlet Witch has posed:
There's an amused laugh from Wanda, a terribly soft one, her own hand curling around his scarred one, the other hand reaching over to stroke along the top of his, tracing those scars. "It does not sound so very romantic that way, does it? But it would make it so much simpler. We do as we did with the kisses. We decide it is okay, and we do them."

Her gentla gaze is lifted back to him, "You can not disappoint me, Nolan. I did decide this already, that I wished you. I think even before I met you, I knew you would be the one." She considers. "We should eat first?" Because, unlike him, she's not really embarked upon this sort of a venture before, and beyond deciding it is what she wants, she's no actual plans.

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight doesn't know if he should be relieved.. or even MORE scared now.. because they are committed. And commitment, be it spiritual or physical, is a scary scary thing. IN fact, he believes that this moment is much like sitting in an airplane, just waiting for it to reach the proper height for someone to jump out of. He nods and picks up his plate of food, as well as a fork, and offers a shaky smile. "Yes.. Eat first.." he says, then eyes the glass of wine.. No no, food first.

"And you're right, it's not very romantic the way I put it... But..." he takes a bite of his rigatoni and swallow it, trying to savour the savoury flavours, then swallowing. "Romance is not my forte."

Scarlet Witch has posed:
Wanda offers Nolan another smile. "It is okay. We are not so much the romance together, are we? I mean, to look at us, we are not the expected. Perhaps it is only that we do things our way."

His hand is given another pat before she releases it, and gestures towards the wine. "Go on. I did bring it. It is meant to be had. And I am not worried."

She takes her own plate of food and begins to eat.

"I did not meant to make it seem I was ungrateful, Nolan. I am fine with what we have. It is romance, but not how others might see." Again, she smiles at him. "I did see your face when you spoke of me. It was beautiful. I would rather that than the expected."

Deadwatch has posed:
Nolan Voight looks at her a moment... as if trying to find something to sasy to that last remark.. but can't. He smiles, though, looking shy as he turns back to his plate and picks up another bite full of his itallian dinner.. Because there is really nothing HNEEDS to say about that. She said it all.