513/Need Coffee

Need Coffee
Date of Scene:	20 May 2017
Location:	New York City
Synopsis:	Summary needed
Cast of Characters:	Darcy Lewis, Thor, Sif

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Darcy Lewis has posed:
After meeting Sif in the park, Darcy had to get to work. But hte moment she was free, she called Sparky. "Dude, Thunderpants! We gotta talk, buddy. You done fucked up. Where the hell are you, anyway? Look. Whatever. Doesn't matter. Get your sorry ass to Central Perk, by the park. You're buying me coffee and then I'm gonig to tell you all about how you don't just poof leave a chick, you poor poor dumbfuck." All this, as she's making her way down the street toward said coffee shop.

Thor has posed:
Thor Odinson seems a bit surprised by the phone call he gets. And so he hails a yellow vehicle that conveys persons from one place to another, and he does arrive, eventually, at Central Perk. Granted, he could just fly thre, but apparently skyscrapers get mad when you zip by and the wind force you're using to fly sometimes brekas said glass. Apparently they get 'touchy' about that and file these things called 'complaints' with the department that takes such 'complaints.' And so, Thor walks in dressed in a t-shirt and jeans, since the weather is actually a bit warm in NYC at the moment. Breezy but warm, and so he lets the wind have its way with his hair.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
Thor walks in, Darcy spots, him and she walks over to bap bap bap bap bap at his arm. His big muscly beefcakey arm.

"What is your deal? Seriously! She knows how to use a sword at stabby things with it! And you think it's a good idea to just poof? You are a dumbass. Sparky McDumbass Thunderpantsian!"

Thor has posed:
And of course, Thor booms in a loud voice, "Darcy!" He picks the woman up, most unceremoniously, greeting her with a large hug before setting her down. "I wondered which of your realm had left me such a bizarre message. As if one could wear pants of thunder," he says, chuckling as if Darcy Lewis were the reincarnation of Richard Pryor...with boobs. But no, as he looks to her and she says he poofed, Thor looks confused. "One does not...poof? That...would be ridiculous. The word is actually rather ridiculous as I think of it. And why does my doing this poofy thing mean that the Lady Sif is going to use her sword on me?"

Darcy Lewis has posed:
Darcy's short. She's not small, she's just fun sized and curvy, and unapologetic about both of those things. So, when she's picked up, she winds her arms and legs about the tree trunk that is the God of Thunder, and just clings like the spider monkey is knows her totem spirit animal must be some days. Like righ tnow.

"Because, you big dumb golden labby, she loves you enough to worry about your dumbass enough that she started randomly accosting peoplein in the park demanding to know where Stark is because apparently Stark knew where you were only he DIDN'T and I got told it was my turn to be your fucking baby sitter. Do you know how annoying it is to baby sit without getting paid for it? No? Well, it fucking sucks and you have to buy her flowers, or booze, or both, and then fucking make up and out already I swear to fuckign Jesus!" Darcy mental word vomits the moment she's on her feet. While resuming the bap bap bap on Thor's chest now.

Thor has posed:
First of all, let's be fair. Can we take a moment and mourn Darcy's finger and what has likely become of it after poking him so hard and so frequently in the chest? Second of all, as he is spider monkeyed, Thor just regards the ground, all...14 inches away from where he lifted Darcy and gently sets her back down. "You talk a lot, and quickly, friend of my shield maiden. Though Lady Sif is mad with me you say," he says and taht would be enough to make most Asgardians think that maybe a trip to Jotunheim wouldn't be such a bad idea. A different type of frostbite to be sure. "You do not buy an Asgardian warrior flowers by way of apology. You duel them! So be it then. Do you think we could get the folks in here to make room?"

Sif has posed:
"Probably not. They don't like their buildings being knocked down," Sounds Sif's voice from behind the Thunderer. "And I am not mad... I was simply... Concerned about the interference to my duties as your Sword and Shield." Which for those who speak Sif is: I was worried.

She peers around Thor to Darcy and grins. Much better greeting that the mortal got the first time! "You may break something if you keep doing that." It would seem the Goddess is in much better spirits this time.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
Darcy lays off her bapbaps to lean to the side and peer at Sif. Her green eyes narrow in thoought.

"You masterbated, didn't you?"

Darcy will come back to Thor in a moment. First, this mic drop.

Thor has posed:
Well....Star magazine has its cover for the week. "Thor not satisfying war goddess; resorts to taking things into her own hands."

Still, Thor turns and smiles at Sif, and says in the same booming force he did when he saw Darcy, "SIF!" See, nothings' wrong. A quick inspectin should reveal he still has all eyes and ears and fingers and such. No, he doesn't appear to have gotten harmed on wherever he was going. "You need not worry my dear Sif, I was not going to be harmed where I was going." Which, to be fair, Thor pretty much assumes that's anywhere he goes, including probably black holes, wood chippers and Thanos' lair. "What does that mean...." he asks, out randomly. "Master bation...did you mean master vacation? Did she take time off?"

Sif has posed:
And look him over Sif does. In minute detail. When she's satisfied, she finally steps in to reach up and hug him. "Good. I don't like the idea of killing you because you are reckless." She's glad he's okay.

And then she's blinking at Darcy. "I.. What?" Of course, distraction comes in the form of Sif 'accusing' her of taking time off. "I most certainly have not." Like... 'vacation' is the dirtiest, foulest thing...ever!

Darcy Lewis has posed:
Darcy laughs. "Not vacation! Masterbation!"

An elderly couple near by look scandalized and get up to leave.

"You weren't around to rock her jollies, so.. since she's in a better mood and you didn't hammer her, she clearly took care of it herself." Darcy states before leaning toward Sif and sagenodding.

"Kudos for that, by the way. Guy needs to be reminded sometimes: we can do for ourselves and we share cuz we nice, not cuz we needs them in our nethers."

Thor has posed:
Thor is watching the exchange, and hasn't picked up on all the words, all the terminology. And so, as he looks over, watching the exchange, the light dawns on in him. "Oh! Yes, she does plenty on her own. You could say she masturbates all the time! It really doesn't matter what I say or do. in the end, Sif is going to do what she wants. It's a chronic thing, there's just no getting her to do it any other way than what you described." There, Thor clarifies that nicely. Of course, Star Magazine's headline just changed to a picture of a 'wanted' sign, with Sif's face, and it says: "Wanted:" above her picture,a nyway,a nd beneath it: "Chronic Masturbator."

Sif has posed:
And Sif? She simply looks very very confused about all of this. Surely they can't possibly be talking about what it sounds like they are. "I need coffee." And that, ladies and gentlemen, is Sif avoiding another headache. Now... Someone monitor how much she has. Poor Lara has experienced first hand what happens when Sif has too much coffee. "I've never been here before." ...And it's a brand new menu...

Darcy Lewis has posed:
"...wow..." Darcy watches Sif turn away and avoid the topic. Taking matters, and some of Thor's hair, in her hand, Darcy drags his head down so she can whisper in his ear without tip toeing too much: 'Your Sif's a prude and needs a dicking. Not here. Not now. But you do need to make it up to her that you scared the ever living crap out of her by disappearing that way. So, if you all fight it out, then go to the park across the street, fight then fuck, but for the love of my sanity, let her know where you're GOING next time!"

Thor has posed:
Thor just lets himself be pulled down by Darcy, though he tilts his head curiously, his head canted to the side as he feels the strain a bit and looks to the little dark haired gal who apparently is mama bear to, well, everyone. "I see," he says with a bit of understanding. "I'm supposed to let her know where I'm from or where I'm going," he says with a bit of a frown, eyes narrowed as he speculates what to do while Sif looks to the menu. "This place...it is not the place then for me to do what you said? To apologize and fight? Sif....shallw e go outside and fight? Or shall we do something else? I am not sure that the things thi slitlte one suggests we do are meant for this shop or the park."

Sif has posed:
That private conversation? Yeah. That was missed thanks to ordering. Thor calling to her, however, has her turning to look at him. There's a moment of contemplation as a fifth cup is set on the counter in front of her. "Could we wait until after coffee? I would love to spar with you. It bas been too long since I had a challenge but.. I have yet to try some of these..." Another moment and then she smirks. "I suppose they could wait until after the spar, however..." She looks over at Darcy. "Will you be watching?" Because if there's going to be mortals around.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
"Hell yes coffee waits until after, and I don't want to get all up in ya'lls grill. So you two go, do you, and I'm going to have some coffee and a scone and maybe a bagel." Darcy says, waving her hands dismissively at BOTH dieties as she heads to the counter for her joe.