7495/Part Heaven, Part Space

Part Heaven, Part Space
Date of Scene:	15 May 2019
Location:	Roof Tower - Xavier's School
Synopsis:	Summary needed
Cast of Characters:	Cypher, Cannonball

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Cypher has posed:
After recent events, and the earlier meeting, Doug is on a flat section of roof. He's sitting, one leg curled under him, staring up at the stars and the moon, lost in thought.

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie is out for a late evening fly, truth be told he has been doing it more since Rachel has had to take some time to handle some things. Seems he might have a bit more time on his hands than he knows what to do. As he sees Doug on the roof, he ponders dive bombing him, but instead comes in for a landing.

Cypher has posed:
Doug has a sleepy, dreamlike quality about him sometimes - it seems to take him a few seconds to register Sam, even when he comes in for a landing, but finally his gaze focuses. "Hey." He remains where he is, relaxed. "Sorry, just decompressing for a minute. Sometimes I need to go where it's quiet."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie nods his head a bit and says "If Ah am interupting Ah can go, just saw ya here and thought I would see what Ah missed on the meeting, and see how you were doing." He tells the other.

Cypher has posed:
"Oh. They want us to go talk to Hank and Forge." Doug says. "I took notes." He picks up a notebook, and hands it to Sam. There's doodle of Emma frost in the margins, sloshing a glass of wine and saying 'Do you want ants? Because that's how you get ANTS' "...You said something, before." He says. "That everyone blamed themselves for what happened to me, even Bobby -- but Bobby wasn't there that day."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie nods, and says "He showed up at the island right after. He and Lock had came back and tracked us down. He blamed himself, cause not only did he runaway so was not there, but also that he took lock with him.

Cypher has posed:
Doug considers that, with half-lidded eyes. "When I thought he'd been killed, even though it'd turned out to be a fake, I blamed myself." Then he says, "Bobby and I could only give a crap about one another when one of us was *dead*."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie shakes his head, and says "Na, I think Bobby had a bit of an issue of sharing at times. He did not have to growing up, and then with us, he suddenly had a big family. Also to be honest, I don't think he could stand one of the girls in the group likeing one of the guys and it not being him.

Cypher has posed:
Doug looks faintly puzzled at that. "...What? I know I was beyond pissed at him because of Warlock. I was completely up my own butt about it, because I'd damned myself by my own success. 'Lock didn't need me anymore, and made his own decisions, and the closer he and Bobby got, the *madder* I got. It was stupid, but I felt like the one thing that made me special, he was trying to take it from me."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie nods, and sats "And he blamed himself for that for a while. They stayed close, but never as close as you and lock. And you know him, and his macho a man would not do this or that stuff.

Cypher has posed:
Doug wrinkles his nose, and then he murmurs, "Proud. I was proud. And dumb." Then he looks up, and says, "...Why? Why do you all blame yourselves? Why do none of you blame *me*? I can see the *guilt* when you look at me, and I hate it."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie will look at the other and will pull up a bit of roof to have a seat. "Well honestly? Me personally, Dani, and Ah were the leaders so it fell on us to protect all of you. Then ah felt we did not make sure you were trained enough, did not take precautions we should have. Hell, we let you and Rahne talk us into going there, there was multiple chances if we had made a different decision you would not have died. But tel me, if you had dived out there and the shot had been moments earlier, and it would have been Rahne, do you think you would have gotten over blameing yourself?

Cypher has posed:
Doug gives Sam a dirty look. "...Or if I'd hesitated for just half a second and was too late? ...No. I never would've forgiven myself." He wraps his arm around his knee. "But it was my life to spend. Is. Did you regret bringing me into this? Was the Professor right?" He lets out a sigh. "You're all worth dying for. I'd do it again, without hesitation."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie looks to the man and says "Yea, ah would know nothing of that, Ah would never put my life on the line for my friends." He will look at Doug "You do know that arguement might have had a bit more effect on me a month ago right?"

Cypher has posed:
Doug looks up at Sam, and then says, "No it wouldn't have." He looks down. "I have bad days, Sam. Sometimes it's all too much. But I'm trying." Then he murmurs, "I wanted to be his friend, you know. I really did. But we-- what were you talking about. He couldn't stand that Rahne and I had that puppy love thing going on? Surely you're joking."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie says, "Ah think it was part of it yea. That and he could accept me in a way I was older than him yea, but he thought of me as a haysead for a bit, and when we first met, we were fighting. With you, you were smarter than him got better grades. Rahne had a thing for ya, Kitty seemed to have a thing for ya. You got along with your parents. Then the alien he and Ah found consider you it's best friend. When Ah called him on his bs he could at least think "Well Sam he has had a real job, had things tough, is older, might not want to listen to me, but could justify it. You, you were his age, and could see through his bs, well I don't think his ego could handle it."

Cypher has posed:
Doug murmurs, "He was charismatic. He had confidence. He had savoir faire. He had everything I thought I wanted." Then he shakes his head, "But he's him, and I'm me. And do you know I never once, not ONCE beat him at chess. And I'm *good* at games. But god, even when I thought I had him--" He sighs. "Why am I thinking about all these things now." He stretches his legs out, and says, "...Did you ever regret it? Telling me I was a Mutant?"

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie says, "Well of course Ah did, how many years did Ah have to go, if Ah had not told you, you would still be alive? Hell even now I would not give up your friendship for anything but if Ah had not told you, you would not have died, you would probably still be on good terms with your parents, you would not be worried about giant killer robots. But your alive now, and yea that was the big one that made me regret it. Ah do believe once you find your place you will find life worth living more helping people more than you would have beeing a CPA or something."

Cypher has posed:
"...Lawyer." Doug says. "The plan was to go on Mission and then become a lawyer like my parents, and join the family firm." He raises an eyebrow. "Did I ever tell you I'm a Mormon? ...Was a Mormon."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie hmms and says "No, Ah don't think you did. To be honest, I just assumed Christian, not a specific kind, but then again, should not be suprised a different type. Rahne is Presbyterian, Xian and Berto are Catholic, Dani was well honestly never knew a name for it, but of Native American belief, and then with the whole becoming a Valkery. Amanda the whole Roman gods thing. And me Soutern Baptist. Ah take it the whole darkness while you were dead, has shaken that some?"

Cypher has posed:
"...Well, I'd kind of fallen away from it before that. It wasn't so much a crisis of faith as just realizing I... didn't." Doug says, "I was never that religious to begin with. But after everything I've seen, I can't be a Flat Earth Atheist." Then Doug glances up. "I was just curious, that's all. I'm committed to this, Sam. This life... it changes you. I looked at my parents and they looked at me and I was a *stranger* to them, and I could see it. That was when I knew my old life was really gone for good. Fait accompli." Doug murmurs, "You guys, the X-Men, you're the only family I have left. It's just... it's hard, you know, when I see how guilty all of you still are."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie looks to the other man and says "Well we had years to feel guilty only a few months to get over it. Going to take some time. ah not that sucks but it is true, and would try to hide it from ya, but well we know how well that would work. But all that said and done, Ah aint asked you to be part of the team out of guilt, but out of trust. As Ah said last night don't plan on you riding the bench but I do expect you to train probably more than Ah would someone with a more combat oriented power. Then again some more combat powers have training that others don't see too. Berto, he had to learn not to hit things to hard depending on what he was fighting. And yea the life changes you even my ma saw it. You know Kentucky will always have a place in my heart, but at one point I went home was going to settle down there and do more to help Ma. She about threw me out of the house.

Cypher has posed:
Doug gives Sam a side-eye. "Let me guess. 'Samuel Guthrie, I ain't gonna let you squander yer talents down here in the Holler, you get back out to where ya can do some good in the world!'" he snorts, and curls his lip. He can nail that Eastern Kentucky accent, that's for sure. Then he looks back up at the stars. "I'm just going round in circles. I guess... the long and short of it is, I don't feel like I deserve you guys. I don't feel *worthy*."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie shakes his head, and says "Actually no, more the fact she knew when I lok at the mountains it is home, but there is also whats on the other side. Curiousity and knowing as much as I love it there, being in one little spot would drive me insane." And to be honest she was right. " He looks at the other and says "And as for the not worthy. Well I am gonna call bullshit." And yes he curses, Sam does not do it often but there are timnes it is needed to make a point. "You were willing and did die for your friends. not cause we were gonna go "You know that doug he was really worthy to run with us, or You know since Doug died, we are gonna say his powers were kick ass. No you did it cause you cared for us, and we are family. And if you want to tell me that does not make ya worthy of us, tell me, would ya have done the same thing if it was Berto?

Cypher has posed:
Doug looks up, and then says, "Of course I would've. I was pissed at him, I didn't *hate* him--" He closes his mouth with a snap. "...Damn it Sam, you're not supposed to be able to outsmart my *depression*."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie chuckles a bit at this and says "Never under estimate the whole country logic." He smirks a bit more, and says "You my dear friend are a hero, and your willing to put your life on the line. Ah do believe that puts ya worthy of most about anything. Well except my nanner puddin." He jokes. It is going to take some time to get the feel of things. Ah am sure you needed the time alone to get your head wrapped around being alive and such, but now your gonna have to take time getting your head around others getting their heads around you being alive. I would not even count ya parents off. With time they may come around to wanting to be a part of your life again, and may not. But I say don't give up hope, and pretty sure if you ever need motherly advice you can call ma, and she will listen to ya and tell ya where ya being stupid, just like she does for the rest of us." He looks at the other and says "Speaking of the whole death and coming back, you get all that sorted out on the legal side of things?"

Cypher has posed:
Doug stiffens, faintly. "I ate it. And I'd do it again, too." He assumes an arrogant cock of his chin, and then then he rolls his eyes upward. "I did. It's complicated. I mean it'll stand up to any government scrutiny." Then he glances to Sam, and his expression softens, before he says "You've always been there for me, Sam, changing my whole world, sobering me up... one day, I'll pay you back for everything you've done for me."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie looks over and says "You alread have Doug, your a man Ah can be proud to call friend. And if you saying Ah helped in any way to help ya get there, then you do me more honor than about anything Ah could ever think to ask.

Cypher has posed:
Doug snorts, and then the corner of his mouth turns up. "...Thanks, Sam. I'm so glad that I didn't turn off the light, lock my window and go back to bed when you showed up outside my house with no pants on."

Cannonball has posed:
Samuel Guthrie chuckles and says "Well, Ah will admit, maybe I should have stopped for pants."

Cypher has posed:
"...Nah. It makes for a better story this way." Doug says, with a grin.