7886/What's Up With Laura

What's Up With Laura
Date of Scene:	15 June 2019
Location:	Jean's Room - Xavier's School
Synopsis:	Jean and Laura conclude their conversation, ending with Jean giving Laura an assignment that has to do with discovering and understanding emotions better.
Cast of Characters:	X-23, Phoenix

---

X-23 has posed:
Laura is silent, for a long moment. "When I was being raised...they did not want me to feel. Emotions get in the way. They interfere with the mission. If there was emotion, you buried it. Or you were punished. And they would hurt you. They had people who could hurt me."

She hasn't spoken much about her past, AT ALL. This is the first time she's given details. "Kimura would beat me. And I would heal. And she would beat me more. And when I was sent on missions...I did not want to feel. The cutting became...a way to feel, when I wanted to. To stop being dead inside."

Phoenix has posed:
"That is a horrible thing, Laura," Jean whispers, disheartened, and while she speaks nothing of her own experiences, there is somehow the sense she actually more than visualizes the treatment. "It's a crime to raise a child in this manner."

Jean takes note of the name offered, "Kimura? Was she a member in the organization that tormented you? The people you were forced to work for?" Again Jean reaches to draw Laura into an embrace, this time daring to not state her intention in advance, though she does make sure to slowly part her arms and motion for Laura to lean in closer. She hopes by now Laura has come to understand she never reaches out to harm her. "I wish I could have been there to make this Kimura stop...." should Laura lean in, Jean would reach to slowly caress her hair, "you know now there are more ways to feel, don't you, Laura?"

X-23 has posed:
Laura nods in reply to Jean's early words. "Not a child." They drilled that into her. "A Weapon. I was a weapon, used to kill people. Kimura was one of my trainers. My handlers. When I did not perform as they wanted, it was her job to torture me. She enjoyed her job."

Laura takes the embrace, and it's enough to get her to loosen up. She relaxes in ways with Jean that she doesn't with anyone else.

"Infiltration, assassination. When it was overt...that was easier. I could just go, do the killing, be done. It was harder when they wanted it to be quiet. When they wanted seduction. You didn't want to feel during the sex."

The first time she's told anyone. Someone else would have talked around it, or not brought it up. But Laura is very bad at lying. Even when it's a part of her life even she would rather forget.

"Safer to feel only how and when you want."

Phoenix has posed:
"Ah...a weapon," Jean frowns, "so easy to point a weapon and press a trigger." She shakes her head, "a child is not a weapon. A child has needs, feelings, and is not meant to see the things a weapon does."

"I wonder if Kimura used to grow up in similar conditions to your own...," Jean is always willing to give the benefit of the doubt, and find the good in people. But Kimura didn't really matter now, other than the point she was trying to make. "You don't want to become like this Kimura, do you, Laura?" She asks calmly.

Upon hearing some assignments required seduction and potentially sex, Jean's expression darkens, and for once she gives no comment. Perhaps it is better for those people who made Laura, that Jean has no awareness of their location.

"I understand what you were taught, but then, the fact you cut yourself to 'feel', suggests you weren't a very good student," and when she speaks the words, Jean is teeming with pride, looking with respect at Laura. "You knew it was wrong, you refused to just be a weapon. Not an easy choice to make...did they ever notice you cutting yourself?"

X-23 has posed:
Laura's hands flex into fists when Jean mentions being like Kimura. A dangerous position, since that's usually when the claws come out. But she holds it back, and keeps the claws in, even though her hands stay in fists for a bit. She shakes her head. "No. No one did. Until the others came to bother me in my room." Tight with anger; she is still not at all happy about that.

"I heal too fast. All there is, is to wash off the blood. And I can do that in a sink."

Phoenix has posed:
"The fact you are here with me now, and I am still alive, means you'll never be like Kimura, Laura, and that's your own choice made." Jean explains as she holds Laura's shoulder, keeping her at arm's length to better look into her eyes. Green eyes to green eyes. "I understand why you do it, the cutting, but I want you to stop. I want to replace it, with real emotions, I want you to open that lock and let them out..." she pauses a moment, before reassuring the girl, "not in one day, do it at your own pace, but I'd like to give you an assignment...observe the other students. Even faculty if you like. Even X-Men when on a mission. I want you to take note of all the time you notice them show their emotions in different ways. When you have a few example, come back to me, and let's discuss how they choose to show emotion, and why they do it."

She takes a moment to let Laura processes, and then asks while brushing her fingers through Laura's hair again, "you think you can do that, Laura?"

X-23 has posed:
Laura looks back. "I will. I don't understand why they react like they do. But I will watch, and see what happens." There's a moment's hesitation, and then she adds, after a moment, "Thank you. Things have been very difficult since I left the Facility. You make things much better."

Phoenix has posed:
"I only want you to have what I had, Laura," Jean shares in honest conversation, apparently rewarding Laura's openness with some of her own. "I came to this very school a broken girl, I wasn't strong like you at your age," she readily admits. "Professor Xavier helped mend me, build up whole again, and I am all the better for it. Nobody makes my decisions for me anymore..." Jean says, despite knowing, on a subconcious level, it may not be entirely accurate a statement.

"So I very much want to repay the favor, and help others as I have been helped myself." She now reaches to extend a hand for a handshake with Laura, testing her familiarity with the gesture. "Even if you don't understand, take the notes, do the assignment, and we'll discuss it together. I want you to learn at your own pace, grow familiar, and maybe later, even comfortable with it."

Taking a moment's pause, she adds, "Kitty Pryde and Kurt Wagner might be good people for you to talk to about such manners. You may find they have interesting perspectives."

X-23 has posed:
It's something she's come to be accustomed with since she came here. So she takes the offered hand. "I have spoken with both. My meeting with Kurt was...colored by his annoyance with Lorna. Kitty is a very good person. She is my second favorite person." No need to say who her first is.

Phoenix has posed:
"I am very happy you can see it," Jean smiles once again, "it shows how smart you are at reading people. If you properly channel this knowledge, you will thrive in social situations too, in due time. You may go start on your assignment now, Laura, have a good night. Please tell me if anyone bothers you again like Rachel has."