15612/Soup Is Good Food

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Soup Is Good Food
Date of Scene: 20 September 2023
Location: Spider-Woman's Room, Avengers Mansion
Synopsis: Simon brings soup with the motive of recruiting Jessica to fight his brother and Nekra.
Cast of Characters: Wonder Man, Spider-Woman (Drew)

Wonder Man has posed:
Having heard that a teammate was down mentally, physically, under the weather, or a combination of any of the above, Simon makes plans. First and foremost, there's a place right around the corner that's called Grandma's Chicken Soup. It's a Jewish bakery and eatery and something that Simon recalled loving when he was younger. Plus, it's got 5 stars on the food app for 'food that makes you feel good'. After retrieving the soup and the bread, Simon gets it all dressed up on a tray with a tiny vase and a simple yellow flower sticking out of it. There's a large soup spoon, some hot tea with cream and sugar on the side - because he knows she's secretly British, or something with an accent, and of course the main event, Chicken Soup with Noodles and Matzo Balls with the side of Challah bread and a bit of butter on a side saucer.

He hums a song as he walks up the stairs, turns the corner, does a little spin, and walks up to her door. He might be heard singing, "gonna knock on your door, tap on your window pane..." and then he knocks on her door with a triple rap. Then he calls out, "Delivery for a Jessica Drew." then he makes the Jaws dunt-dunt sound as he flashes back to Saturday Night Live skit of Land Shark and grins to himself.
Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
Jessica Drew's been somewhat awol of late. Although not entirely -- the mansion's compliment of cheese toasties (or rather a specific type of cheese she insists is the only appropriate cheese for toasties) is definitely going down, so she's still appearing to eat, just not hanging out in the public areas of the mansion. Or the public at all.

The door pings. She can hear singing on the other side. Sometimes, having sharp hearing is a detriment.

"Nope," comes the mumbled voice, aloud.

"Ms. Drew, I have to point out that this is unhealthy behavior."

"I'm perfectly aware, JARVIS, and totally leaning into that."

"I will have to stop ordering additional supplies of gruyere."

"You wouldn't!"

"There appears to be a glitch-"


"-and that same glitch is accidentally opening the door."


All of which means Simon is witness to one Jessica Drew -- who is dressed in a dinosaur onesie -- yelling at the ceiling with a flailing of arms, because it's not quite as satisfying yelling at the air. Wild-eyed, she swings around to spear a finger at whomever fronted her door, and stops when she sees Simon. Or more accurately, sees the tray of, quite frankly, delicious smelling soup he's brought.

Her mouth opens, and closes. "You make one comment about the outfit and you're out of here," Jessica says in warning as she stalks towards Simon and grabs the bowl from him. Seems she approves. "Wanda put you up to this? Or JARVIS?" She breathes in the soup, and sighs. "JARVIS, turn the filters up to high." Then she paces back into her room, leaving the door open -- and Simon holding the rest of the tray -- in apparent invitation.

The room's as lushly appointed as all of them are in the mansion, and there's a small table with four chairs around it. Jessica slumps into one.
Wonder Man has posed:
Stepping into the room, Simon's red eyes are transfixed on the outfit. His face is elated, he smiles broadly, thrilled that he's even allowed in the room, but to witness the spectacle that is before him. When she takes the bowl he is pulled from the fascination and daydreaming of matching outfits with her - because he still loves dinosaurs - do boys ever grow up? nope.

He intones. "I would never throw shade on something so amazing." is all he says for now. For now. Instead, he's got the rest of his mission and his other answers, "No, nobody put me up to this. I just happened to hear that you needed soup. And.. well, I know the best soup places."

Glancing around the room, he'll look for her destination and follow a few steps behind. All the the intent of sitting the tray within her reach when she finally lands and then backing away, to give her space.

The bread is warm, the soup is hot.
Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
The faint grunt that Jessica gives seems to be grudging acceptance of Simon's praise for her outfit. "It's amazing what you can get at Walmart these days." Why yes, she lives in a billionaire's mansion and shops at Walmart. She hasn't yet discovered the Avengers' card serves as a credit card, perhaps a deliberate omission.

"I don't need soup," Jess says, with a furrow of brow, and then she takes a spoonful of it, swallowing. "That is to say, I need /this specific bowl/, but not soup in general," comes the hasty correction. It's good soup, and Jessica really is a sucker for good food. "There are good soup places?" she sounds dubious. "Soup isn't even real food."

Yet despite this sentiment, she sure does seem to be enjoying it, pulling her feet up onto the edge of the chair and balancing the bowl on her knees as she takes spoonfuls. She's several in before she notices him just... standing there. This gets a bit of a side-eye. "You can sit," she finally says. "The filters are up high, so it should be safe."

Safe? Huh?
Wonder Man has posed:
In a feigned tone of being aghast, Simon says, "Girl.. did you just say 'soup isn't even real food'? There's no friggin way you just said that. It's like... dumplings, collard greens, and other things that.." and he chuckles offering a comical tone of tapping the brakes, "Yeah, I'll stop. Anyway.. Filters? Oh wait.. filters..." he looks around and grabs a chair to swing it around, turning the back toward her and straddling it to take a seat with his arms on the back. He is even within 10 feet and he continues, "No worries with that. I don't really breathe or have the insides to process pheromones. So it's all good." He pauses there to allow her to process his lack of direction in conversation - or perhaps it's Adult ADHD. Or whatever.
Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
"I did say it and I will fight you for it if you want. I can't even pick it up! Like it's literally just water and... stuff." It's just plain logic as far as Jessica is concerned. "If you put the best cheeseburger in front of someone, and the best bowl of soup, you think anyone's going to be like, 'oh, I'm definitely picking the soup'?" The last is mimicked in a high-tone voice.

It's only apparent there was tension in Jessica's posture when it seems to release with a sharp exhale. "You don't breathe?" Jessica echoes, startled. "How does that even work?"
Wonder Man has posed:
Simon is visually glad to see Jessica being so animated and engaged about the soup argument. Or anything for that matter. He was expecting to find a lump on a rock or a girl hiding beneath the blanket. He didn't know what to expect. But he's glad he's gotten a rise out of her. That's a good sign in his brain.

Instead of pushing the soup fight farther, he drops it and smiles. Plus, he's got other conversations to focus on. When asked about not breathing there's a moment of reflection as Simon tries to sort the words to explain. Knowing he's told the story a hundred times, he still finds confusion in it himself. He says, "Basically.... I'm energy inside this shell of a man." then he realizes that didn't sound quite right. "I mean. Yes, I'm made out of energy. But I still have stuff inside of me. Things that are essentially analogs of a normal human, but energy solidified. Which is why I can take in breath and push it out through vocal folds to make sound. Anyway, I don't process bio agents, toxins, pheromones, bacteria... etc. I also heal if I'm hurt, and ... other stuff." Then he pauses to get back to the point of the story. "Just know that we're good with all that pheromone stuff."

When it comes to her and her power, his choices are his own and he's his own man. Without outside influence. So he's pretty safe.
Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
In Jessica's brain, the fact that Simon drops the fight means she wins. Which is only logical, because her arguments are wholly sound and not all based in a bias towards burgers. Nope! She looks distinctly satisfied as she continues to eat the soup, and even tries a bit of the bread.

Jessica, really, is no stranger to weird things. After all, she's been a HYDRA agent, a SHIELD agent, and an Avenger for quite some time now. After she processes all of that, she only has one question: "But you /can/ eat cheeseburgers, right? Because I don't know how you can live without it. I haven't had a good one in... ages."

It's evident that some of the reason for her being a shut in is definitely due to 'that pheromone stuff', because she winces. "I put Spider-Man, and Wanda, and Natasha -- and even Steve, somehow -- under. It was awful, the way they looked at me, and when Steve said-" she can't even voice it. It probably seems worse because she doesn't. "Anyway. Wanda thinks it was an evil magician, and it was just a dream but it /wasn't/. Steve hit me with the shield and I had the bruising," she touches her chest, briefly. "So, yeah. I'm just gonna hide out her until Wanda does her magic voodoo."

Jessica's never been one to hide her emotions, really. Despite being a spy, in most cases she's pretty much an open book. It's apparent she's afraid, not for her powers, but for taking /choice/ away from her fellow team-mates.
Wonder Man has posed:
Simon tries to be a good listener. Sitting there, he maintains eye contact, keeps relatively still, has a forward lean (as much as he can with the back of the chair in front of him). He definitely heard that she wants cheeseburgers and he knows the place. But that's a later thing. Right now she's venting and revealing her inner fears and/or anxieties. He sits quietly for a moment and gives a nod to various points she indicates. He even reiterates a bit of the inferred synopsis back to her. "I understand that it's something you didn't want to happen - and I'm sure they understand that as well. But hiding isn't the answer; and I'm pretty sure I know a guy who might have the answers for your predicament. If, you're interested."
Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
"No. Hiding is definitely the answer," Jessica counters, with absolute authority. "I would go back to my apartment, but ubereats struggles to find it, for whatever reason." Plus, she's kind of fond of JARVIS. It's definitely the British accent.

It really doesn't take her long to get to the bottom of the bowl of soup, using the bread to sop up the remnants. Simon's latter words gets a dubious look from Jess. "You know a guy," a beat, "Who knows how to mess with spider DNA? I think I'll hard pass on that one." She sighs, leaning back. "I have the perfume. But still." Yeah, she's more than a little curious, but far too wary to admit it.
Wonder Man has posed:
Simon gives a brief nod of understanding and a look of concern when he reflects back to the Wanda option and the lack of scientific method behind her ... methods.

Seeing that she's finishing up with the soup and the bread, Simon stands and will slide the chair back where he found it. He then offers, "Well, I think you might know him too. Henry McCoy, Hank, Beast. He's an X-Man and a part time Avenger, and got like 20 degrees in biochemistry. I was just thinking that getting his eyes on it for Science instead of magic ju-ju.. but... Anyway. I also have another motive for getting you out of this room. I've got a problem and you've got solution written all over you."
Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
"Oh, Bruce already did all that. The... biochemistry whatever. That's how he created the neutralizer. We tried an implant too, which worked okay when I was long term undercover... until it didn't." Nothing in Jessica's expression gives away what she feels about that. She's just flat neutral. It matters to her when she affects friends. HYDRA though? She doesn't care so much.

"And the magic ju-ju is for... the evil magician. You have to fight fire with fire. Or one bad-ass magician with another, I guess. By the way have I mentioned how super glad I am that Wanda is on our side?" Yeah, she really likes the woman but Wanda sure scares the heck out of her sometimes.

Jessica's just reaching for the tea when she hears the word /motivation/. She frowns, lifting the empty bowl of soup. "No string. Huh." Simon just gets a kind of dubious look. "What kind of problem? If it's the problem where you need someone punched in the face, I'm absolutely your girl."
Wonder Man has posed:
Simon seems to be looking to clean up now that she's finished the soup and bread. Having put the chair aside, he takes a step or two closer to her and the tray. He takes the lifted empty bowl from her and will sit it on the tray while he embraces the segue to the topic he finally broached with her.

He says with a lower more serious tone, "So, I went back to the old neighborhood and heard a bit about my brother, Eric - You now him as the Grim Reaper." ( https://comicvine.gamespot.com/grim-reaper/4005-7227/ ) Simon pauses, lifts the tray and steps back again. He continues, "He's up to no good again and he's plotting something. He's hooked up with his old girlfriend and they're nothing but trouble together. From what I read, you and she have a past. You remember Nekra, right?" ( https://comicvine.gamespot.com/nekra/4005-13896/ )
Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
Simon being all proactive and cleaning makes Jessica frown. She's inherently messy, so it feels like a call out, even if it's not intended that way. She gulps down most of the tea and sets the mug on the tray just before he lifts it.

"If by history you mean she experimented on me, sure." Jessica is surprisingly not at all angry about this, like it's something that just happens to her. She sighs. "I'm going to have to get changed, aren't I?" She tugs the 'hood' of her dinosaur onesie down, tugging a hand through her hair. "Do you want Spider-Woman, or Jess?"
Wonder Man has posed:
The tea cup is received and he withdraws. "Both." answers Simon as he moves half way toward the door. "But not right now. We've got a little time. I don't even have a clue where they are set up. I need to do a bit more knocking on doors and talk to a few contacts in the old neighborhood precinct. They always kept up with Eric. I just know that when he and Nekra get together, nothing good comes out of it."

He pauses and glances back to Jessica with a grin, "Plus, I need a little time to find a set of Barney the Dinosaur pajamas so we can hang out together and watch Nick at Night."
Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
Knocking on doors requires leaving her rooms, willingly. It gets Simon a narrow-eyed consideration from Jessica. "Fine. But you're going to have to pay with more than just soup. Cheeseburgers, next time." A beat. "And a milkshake." It's not like she ever has to watch her weight. Her metabolism is impressively scary at times.

Jessica isn't sure whether Simon's just humoring her with the pajama remark, but really -- does she need an excuse to lounge in informal bright clothes (absolutely not), and watch cartoons (nope).

"Deal. Amazon prime delivery. How do you think I make Clint wear all those wild and wacky t-shirts?" It's true, Hawkeye's been sporting some real weird ones lately.
Wonder Man has posed:
Simon chuckles and passes through the door, "Glad you're feeling better. I'll ring you when I find something we can act on."

And with that, he's gone, but he did leave the door open. Just an invitation for her to take it upon herself and get out of her room. Or at least look down the hallway at her leisure. Perhaps she'll see someone else she can be harassed by.