3012/Log 3012

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Log 3012
Date of Scene: 29 October 2017
Location: Unknown
Synopsis: Summary needed
Cast of Characters: Melinda May, Darcy Lewis, Quake, Hawkeye (Barton), Spider-Woman (Drew)




Melinda May has posed:
It's Sunday evening, and a rare one in that May is not off on a mission somewhere. She actually managed to have the entire weekend off. On the very rare times that happens, she's started a tradition: she cooks. And, knowing that just the smell of food usually draws people in, she's in the habit of cooking a LOT of food. Also because she's preparing food for what seems like an army, she's recruited a sous chef.

Having claimed the largest break room in the Triskelion for this culinary diversion and the cooking having already begun, May suspects that others will likely begin filtering in soon.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
Darcy does not cook well at all. Which is why she got recruited.

THis is not to say that Darcy doesn't know how to rock a pack of ramen and TV dinner. It's just that anything past that gets too complicated for a girl living on her own.

Right now, Darcy's chopping something. A carrot? whatever May asked her to chop up.

Quake has posed:
Skye.. well, she'd /planned/ on working. Not like she doesn't live in the breakroom mostly at the best of times, but weekends are quiet, and Sundays particularly so.

The smell of food, however, should have been a warning. It didn't smell like Mrs. Noodles with a handful of frozen veggies tossed in as a nod to nutrition (which is exactly what she'd planned on making for her dinner while she worked). It smelt rather.. like cooking. Actual real, live cooking. And because she was a glutton for punishment, Skye still paused to peek her head round the door to see who and what.. Also to complain. Whoever it was had stolen her working spot. Everyone knew the breakroom was Skye's office. Everyone.

Hawkeye (Barton) has posed:
    Was that food? Clint Barton is on his way to drop off a mission report before hitting the gym but smelling what's coming out of the break room, he hurries on, crams the report in the proper box then hurries right back. "Private party or can anyone join?" he asks from the doorway, standing behind Skye, really, really hoping it's the latter. The food smells great.

Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
Jessica Drew, also makes her way over, dressed in her Spiderwoman costume, though the hood is off, hanging down her back, and she kind of pauses at the traffic jam that is forming at the breakroom, coming to a stop behind Clint who's behind Skye. "Hey Barton, what's going on in there?" she asks, lifting up on her tip-toes to try and peek a bit.

Melinda May has posed:
At the growing traffic jam in the doorway, May simply calls out, "Quit blocking the door. Barton, help withe the chopping." An onion gets thrown in his direction.

"Drew, figure out beverages." There's not really much variety to choose from, but there's likely the materials to make some decent iced tea.

"Johnson, get out of the way." She has yet to evaluate Skye's usefulness in food matters. She suspects they're worse than Lewis's, and reaches over to keep Darcy from cutting one of her own fingers.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
Barton's going to help chopping? Sweet! And he gets the onion? Double score!! Darcy's lips pull into a board smile as she turns to look over at the door.

Really. it's a good thing May reached over, since Darcy had stopped looking at what she was doing.

"Hey! Shit Code. Clear us a table and save me a seat or I'm sitting in your lap, wife," Darcy says brightly. The day, it seems just got better and better! Jessica is glanced at. New face. Slim build. Girl's got Jammer or positional Blocker written all over her. Darcy gives Jessica a smile until The Look from May gets her back to chopping.

Quake has posed:
Skye's nose is crinkled, at first at the backlog behind her that keeps her from being able to back away, and then, further at not even being assigned a position to help with. /NOT/ that she wanted to help, but principle and all.

Grudgingly, she makes her way into the breakroom, and sets her laptop on one of the tables, flipping open the lid. She's quite content to not help. See if she cares.

Hawkeye (Barton) has posed:
"May's cooking," Clint says looking back to wave at Jess before stepping into the room past Skye. "Hey," he greets her not quite placing her with the recruits he was shooting at last week.

Catching the onion one-handed Clint heads for the kitchen. He plops the thing down next to Darcy to claim his counter space then moves on to find a cutting board and a knife. "Hey, Darce, how's it going?" he asks as he searches.

Finding his prizes, he heads back to the counter and puts the onion on the board and lifts the knife only to pause and ask "So, what are we making?" he asks as he peers at Darcy and May's work to try and guess.

Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
Jessica Drew a little 'oh' comes to Jessica's face at Clint's explanation, "That's what that smell was." She says, stepping into the room behind Clint and heading straight for the coffee maker and goes about starting a fresh pot of coffee, for starters. She glances over towards Darcy and gives her a bit of a nod before looking over at May, "So May, is Coffee good enough, or should I keep looking?"

Melinda May has posed:
Clint's question gets a prompt reply from May. "Stir fry." Because it's simple enough, can be made in ridiculous quantities, and uses fairly simple ingredients. May rescues Darcy's fingers from her own knife again, and this time takes the knife away from her. "Darcy, go make the monkey bread. Get Skye to help you."

She checks on the noodles cooking, then tells Jessica, "Tea would be good as well." Does he really need to say it out loud AGAIN that he hates coffee? Taking over Darcy's chopping duties, she gets through the carrot in about a fourth of the time then gets to prepping the chicken while leaving the rest of the veggies for Clint to disassemble. She has no doubts that he can handle the task, considering the amount of time he's worked with Natasha and her knife skills.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
As loudly as Darcy had bitched about being made to chop veggies, she protests just as loudly when the knife is taken away, at least until she's told about monkey bread.

Monkey bread Darcy can do!!! Especially since after the FIRST time May showed her how and Darcy fell in love with it, she printed teh recipe and left it in a drawer.

"Fuck yes," she says, turning from the chopping happily to make her eay over to Skye. She leans over the table, putting her hands on the back of the laptop screen and pushing so it closes.

"I said, HEY SHIT CODE! Come and make a monkey with me," Darcy says, leaning into Skye's face so she'd be impossible to miss this time. By the smile on her face she's not horribly upst by it.

Not that it's gonna stop her from being annoying about it.

Hawkeye (Barton) has posed:
May guessed right about Clint's knife skills and he makes short work of the onion and moves on to the other veggies fast enough as well. "What's monkey bread?" he asks May as he chops. "Besides something Darcy likes to make, apparently."

Quake has posed:
So much for pretending she wasn't here.. When her laptop closes with a *snap* Skye gives Darcy a /very/ dry look. "You may have just doomed the free world to an early death, I hope you know. Never, and I do mean /never/ close someone's laptop without making sure they've saved first."

Of course she's saved, though. She's got that on auto, and in a faster increment than most folks would even consider necessary... That, and she'd not started anything yet.

"Righto, Glitter Tits, what is it you think you want, huh?" Yes, she'd heard the request to clear a spot and totally ignored it. But she'd heard it all, managing to voice, "Yo, dude" She speaks to the only man in the room, "coffee would be wonderful." Especially if she doesn't have to make it.

Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
Jessica Drew glances over towards Skye as she asks for coffee, then a glance towards Clint and a little smirk offered. She then makes her way over to one of the cabinets to start rooting around for tea, pulling out an assortment of tea bags that have been left about by various agents and such.

Melinda May has posed:
With the noodles done, the chicken prepped, and Clint making quick work of the veggies, May cranks up the wok she had ready and waiting then drops the chicken in to a loud sizzle. And, of course, she takes a moment to set the oven for Darcy.

Once the ingredients are prepped, the stirfry cooks up quickly, and May nods her thanks to Clint for the help with the veggies.

"There should be plenty of ice if anyone wants their tea cold," she offers while Jess starts getting the tea made. And she can only be inwardly glad that she's kept her personal stash of tea well-hidden.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
"Free world can suck my dick," is Darcy's retort, unafraid of the threat. Laptop drug across the table away from Skye, Darcy reaches out to grab Skye's hand and tug her to her feet.

"I want you to come and make some monkey with me. Involves the time honored tradition of raiding that cabinets for noms," says say, trying to drag drag Skye with her while giving Jess, whom she doesn't know?, a smile.

"I love your face for making coffee! May's stash is in the fourth drawer, with the utensils, in the back under the napkins."

Helpful Darcy is helpful! And makes May tea lots, so she always knows where the stash is. Also, who do you think helps keep it stocked!!

Quake has posed:
Skye makes cranky face at Darcy, but checking out the odds in the room, and already knowing she can count May on Team Darcy in this one, she lets her laptop remain where it is and her hand be dragged. "Listen, wife, not sure what this monkey is, but we're not making anything unless I'm on a first name basis with the rest of the folks in the room." She chuckles as she says it, knowing the other is quite likely to take her not only at face value, but run with it into the worst possible scenario one could imagine.

"Why would anyone drink cold tea?" Says she who drinks her coffee cold for lack of successful fending for herself. Clueless Skye is clueless, and about to be indoctrinated into the secret world of kitchens.

Hawkeye (Barton) has posed:
Clint turns around, knife laid down on the block. "Hey, get your own coffee, I'm cuttin' here," he says with a grin and a really bad New York accent. "As for coffee Jess has the bevies, not me. For those who haven't met her yet, this is Jessica Drew, Jess, this is Darcy and um, computer girl, didn't catch your name." He turns back to the cutting board to get things all piled together to be slid into the wok.

Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
"I don't know if you've got enough clearance for May's private stash." Jess retorts towards Darcy's request, moving to feth some hot water, and takes the tea packs she's gathered and opens them, depositing them in the water to start steeping.. they probably were all the same type of tea, at least. She nods at Clint and glances at the two, "Darcy and Computer girl, huh."

Melinda May has posed:
Stil minding the stirfry and adding ingredients as they're due, May calls across to the others, "Barton, Drew, Skye Johnson. Skye, Agent Barton, sniper with a bow specialization, and Jessica Drew, field agent." She figures Drew can explain the costume and powers herself. After all, Darcy just gave up HER tea stash. Bad form, Lewis.

"Stirfry's nearly ready, someone get the plates and utensils out."

Darcy Lewis has posed:
"Of course I've got clearance! Pssht, I'm a Tea Goddess," Darcy says before supplying Skye's name as: "She's Shit Code."

See the angel's smile on Darcy's face?

"Barton's first name's Clit," Darcy supplies oh so helpfully as she gets Skye to wash hansd with her and start on the making of hte Monkey Bread. Biscuit dough from the fridge and then all the raisins and nuts and banana she and Sky can find. And brown sugar and butter. Because that's jsut the shit we have in the Triskelion. Sugar and cinnamon too. This cake's the shit, like Skye.

Hawkeye (Barton) has posed:
Clint turns and gives Darcy a look. Yeah, she's going to pay for that, eventually, for now he corrects, "I think what Sparkle Tits means is my first name is Clint," he supplies guessing Skye meant Darcy when she called someone that. "Anyhow, nice to meet you, foods up," he adds as he turns to claim some dishes from the cabinets and put them down by the wok.

Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
"So why Sparkle Tits?" Jessica asks as she makes her way away from the tea, leaving it to steep in the hot water unattended, arms coming to cross over her chesst as she finds a spot against the table to lean, glancing from Clint to Darcy, "Did May have you doing some undercover work at the strip club or something?"

Quake has posed:
Skye is a reluctant participant of the handwashing process, ruining the whole effect by drying her hands upon her shirt. Clint gets an arch of brow as May introduces him. "Ah, so you're the asshole." She nods, remembering quite well the mystery bowman from that training excercise. "And you did not just call me computer girl. Seriously?"

She shakes her head.

Jessica's question makes her smirk, but she doesn't explain, letting Darcy run interference on that one.

Melinda May has posed:
With the stirfry done, May deftly dumps the wok's contents into a large serving platter and sets it aside to wash up later. Serving spoons are added, and May steps out of the way anticipating a minor stampede to get at the food. "Food's ready. Serve yourselves." She takes the chance to clean off and wipe down the counter they'd been using to prep the ingredients.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
"Oh, yeah! Clint. Slip of the tongue," Darcy says, poking the tip of said tongue out at Barton and winking as she seems to just be hapzardly shoving ingredients into a bundt cake mold.

"Oh! That's because my nipple rings are rhinestones and sparkly and make my chest even more fab than it already is. Ask May. My tits are fantastic, right, Boss?"

Sexual harassment training? What sexual harassment training? Was that that meeting we had to sit through with the boring power point? Darcy had her earbuds hidden in her hair and had been listening to her playlist while staring at the curtains.

Soon as the cake is ready, Darcy drops it into the oven and then heads for the serving platter.

"I love you May, in a totally platonic scary aunt kind of way."

Melinda May has posed:
"No comment," is all May says back to Darcy. She's expecting that to cause an epic pout.

Quake has posed:
Skye slips in, "Agent Mom." Yeah, she's heard that one too. She's not saying where or when.

Hawkeye (Barton) has posed:
"You left out the cool parts, May, like Avenger," Clint says with a smile for the other agent before he turns to Skye raising an eyebrow. "Asshole? That's a bit strong for calling the girl with the computer, computer girl," he remarks with a bit of a chuckle. "Or did we meet before?" he asks. Always possible it was a big agency.

"Jeeze, one of those mysteries best left unsolved," is Clint's only reaction to the Sparkle Tits thing, he goes and gets some food. Yum, food, no HR issues there.

Quake has posed:
Skye grins at Clint, her lips a twisting of mirth. "Oh, we met before. You just don't know it, Clit."

She 'helps' Darcy - a thing Darcy may regret as Skye has two helpful modes: 1) shove singular random things into the monkey bread, or 2) shove all the things into one ungraceful pile as she tucks up the edges of the dough around the mound of nuts and cherries and other dried fruits, a large dollop of cinnamon put on top while she grimaces. "There?"

"You shot at me. Nearly took me out, too. Instead my ass got popped by May - er, Agent May over there. Still beat you." That grin returns to her lips.

Then she realizes something. "Hey," she scolds May with a laugh. "Whatever happened to Daisy, huh? At this rate I may as well walk around with a nametag saying who I am and what I do for the people in the cheap seats. Not," she continues, "That it's going to matter once the mission goes down."

After that she may as well be Skye, because there will be no hiding her presence in SHIELD after that.

Melinda May has posed:
May was TRYING to be nice to Skye by not saying her real first name in front of Barton. Because she's almost positive he's going to latch onto it and tease her incessantly. But, now the kid's brought it upon herself. May will not be held responsible.

"Next time, Lewis, I think dump cake would be a better idea." Because there is no way to screw up a dump cake. Well, there is, but it's VERY difficult.

Spider-Woman (Drew) has posed:
Jessica Drew glances over towards Clint as she listens, "You let the Tech girl beat you?" she asks, her brow raising just a little bit, an incredulous look offered towards Hawkeye before she turns her attention back to Darcy, "Watch out with those things if you get in any real hand to hand, you don't want someone with an easy handhold like that to take you down with." She starts over towards the stir fry now, grabbing a plate and waiting for her turn to dish herself up.

Darcy Lewis has posed:
First helpful mode is best helpful mode, and Darcy is completely ok with how Skye does it.

"That's why you're the Shit, babe," Darcy chirps happily at Skye, washing her hand one last time. Waitressing taught Darcy well.

"That's why I wear a fucking bomb-ass sports bra," Tazer says to Jess, grinning madly.

Plate served, Darcy makes way for others, heading for a table but waiting to sit.

Hawkeye (Barton) has posed:
Smirking Clint asks, "Wait, are you Daisy or Skye? And in either case just how big of hippies were your parents?" he asks before getting his food. When it's plated he looks back to Daiskye and chuckles. "You were the big winner with the sore butt, huh? Grats," he offers as he sits down at the table. "You know we were going easy on you right?" he teases before looking up to Jess and protesting. "It was a group loss. Bucky and May were there too." He tucks into his stir fry. "Someone pass me a tea?" he asks. "No ice."

Quake has posed:
Oh.. he's stepped in it now. Skye gives Clint a sour look, "I don't have parents you asswipe. But thanks." Unlike the others, she doesn't head for the food, instead moving to collect her laptop.

Melinda May has posed:
And then May appears to set her hand on the laptop. "Eat first. If you're going to save the known world, don't be hangry when you do it." She will march Skye back over to the stirfry by one elbow if she has to, but one way or another, the kid's gonna have a proper meal. Not another candy bar and cup of sludge coffee.